You jokes

Orphanage

  • Peter: Curses!

    Jacob: Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?

    Peter: *Crying*

    Jacob: Why are you crying?

    Jacob: Whatever. *Leaves orphanage*

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  • Friend

  • So I had an idea: you and a friend go bar (pub (whatever you call it)) hopping and propose to said friend in each one so everyone buys you free drinks and you get drunk and have a great time.

    Literal

  • Therapist: So what brought you here today?

    Wife: He's too literal.

    Therapist: And you, sir?

    Husband: My truck.

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  • Pen

  • I was spending my holiday in Paris with my gf. As we were walking near the city, a meteor hit and killed my gf.

    Forensics did an autopsy on the corpse and concluded that someone missed a pen and hit my gf from the PSG training ground. SHAME ON YOU PESSI FOR RUINING MY LIFE! 🤬😡

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  • Doctor

  • My willy was feeling itchy, so I decided to go to the doctor.

    My doctor was foreign and spoke Spanish with an Argentinian accent. As I returned home, I noticed my willy was gone! Pessi stole my PENis thinking it was a Penalty just so he could statpad. SHAME ON YOU!

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