You know, it takes a lot of balls to successfully compete in women’s sports as a man.
You Jokes
This dwarf was being mean to me, so I said, "When you get home, I hope Snow White kicks the shit out of you."
What do you call a gay dinosaur?
A mega-sore-ass.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
A-lick-a-lot-of-puss.
What do you call sweaty titties?
Humititties.
What do you call a whale on a beach?
Banked.
I am the ice cream man running over fat kids with my van. If you touch my van, I’ll smack you in the face with a frying pan. If you steal ice cream, I’ll shoot you in the face with a fudge machine.
What do you call a stoned Mexican?
Baked bean.
How do you know you are blessed by God?
You don’t laugh at, make light of, or enjoy the evils and suffering people are inflicting on themselves and upon each other.
Have you met Bofa?
Bofa deez blind kids!
If you don't like orphan jokes, WHY THE HELL ARE YOU ON HERE??!!! WE DON'T ACCEPT YOU HERE!
If you saw an orphan, could you say where your parents at? And if they cry, just say, "hey here are your parents" then grab nothing. Perfect example.
Why don't you see gay people in wheelchairs?
Because once you're a fruit, you can't be a vegetable.
Have you heard about the guy whose friends teased him because he pays for sex? He doesn't pay anymore.
The teacher asks, "Who is a Trump fan?" Everyone in the class, wanting to be liked by their teacher, all put their hands up, except for Little Johnny. The teacher asks, "Little Johnny, why are you being different again?" Little Johnny says, "Because I'm not a Trump fan." The teacher asks, "Why are you not a Trump fan?" and Little Johnny says, "Because my dad's a democrat and my mum's a democrat so I'm a democrat." And then his teacher says, "So if your dad was an idiot and your mum was a moron, what would that make you?" And Little Johnny replies, "A Trump fan."
Me: Do you like smash?
Friend: Smash Rolls?
Me: No, Smash DEEZ NUTS!
Friend: AHHHHH (*moans)
What do you call a bored robot?
A “sigh”-borg.
Why did they put the Petronas towers? Eh, you do you.
Why did the orphan get sent to the principal's office?
Because he punched dumbos like you people!
Did you hear about the emo kid in a wheelchair? Exactly.
(Bus Driver) What did you learn in school today?
(Kid) We learned that you are a sussy baka.
(Bus Driver) Oh yeah? Well, I quit!
(Kid) Quit what?
(Bus Driver) Living.
(Kid) But it was a joke!
(Bus Driver) Doesn't matter. I will die, but you will still be alive.
(Kid) Ok.
(Bus Driver) That was a joke, too!
