Writing jokes
Okay, what do you call a dummy that writes a dumb writer?
Yo mama is so fat that I could write 3 paragraphs, and she still wouldn’t fit.
Fritz Cheng was asked to write three articles on the subject. He went to his grandmother and advised her: "Question: Kill people! I am sorry, Mr. Fritz, I am looking for his brother—what do you suggest?"
Brother: "I'm Superman. I am Superman!"
Fritz remembers entering the room. That's Alfredo's question in front of the TV: "Do you have any advice?"
Fritz tells a story from his school days. "Remember our words?" said Professor Fleck. "An artist? Is that true? Frison, who are you?"
"I am Superman. I'm Superman," he said. "I hope to meet the president."
What do you call a broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless!
Why was Helen Keller truly an inspiration?
She learned how to read and write despite being from Alabama!
We wrote letters to a kid with cancer.
My letter read, "It's a bumpy road, but soon you will have a straight path."
People didn't realize it was meant for his heart monitor. Lol.
Wanna hear a joke about paper? Never mind, it's tear-able.
I can't spell. Spell. Pels. Slepe. Spell. Ellpas[a[dpa[pw[paew[pfopaojf[apdkoc[asndcsdokd Fkuc.
I'm trying to come up with a set-up for an amputee joke, but I'm stumped.
Today, I invented a new word: "plagiarism."
What did the rapper say to his BROKEN PENCIL?
"You broke the beat!"
How do you turn the Roman numeral IX (9) to a six?
Add the "S."
Mississippi is a long word. How do you spell it?
I don't have time to write this joke.
Pulp is a palindrome.
. --... -. -...--.
Hi, I...
Sorry, my cat touched my computer. I don't know how to delete.
The joke is that if you take a cap off a bottle, is it decapitation?
Sorry guys, it's a hard word to spell.
What do you call a blind author?
A Braille writer.
I own a pencil that used to be owned by William Shakespeare, but he chewed it a lot.
Now I can't tell if it's 2B or not 2B.
Wanna hear a terrible joke?
Paper
Pretty tear-able, huh?
Me: Mom, should I kill the main character in the book I'm writing to make things more interesting?
Mom: Sure, honey! What type of book are you writing?
Me: It's an autobiography.