Writing

Writing Jokes

Pencil

Me: Knock knock.

Friend: Who's there?

Me: A broken pencil.

Friend: A broken pencil who?

Me: Nevermind, it's pointless.

Pencil

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Pencil.

Pencil who?

Oh, never mind, it's pointless.

Music

Katy Perry can't sing, can't dance, doesn't write music, is unbelievably ugly, and is unable to decipher maths or science. Really though, I didn't realize going down on a record executive would later lead her to be one of the people able to go to space.

Rapper

What did the rapper say to his broken pencil?

"You're just not SHARP enough for my lyrics!"

Decapitation

Hi, I...

Sorry, my cat touched my computer. I don't know how to delete.

The joke is that if you take a cap off a bottle, is it decapitation?

Sorry guys, it's a hard word to spell.

Pencil

Did you ever hear the story about the broken pencil?

That's okay. There is really no point to it.

Name

The previous joke was by Sebastian Wittrock, but he put Miguel Roberts as the name.

Pencil

As he threw the mechanical pencil toward me, I knew that if I didn't move, I would be lead into serious trouble.

Gun

The kid with a gun walked into my classroom and fucking shot the teacher.

He pointed the gun at me and asked, "What's 2+2?" I answer him and he writes the answer down on his test. He did this with every kid. He got a 100%, expelled, and a lifetime in prison. Hey, at least he gets free food.

Adolf Hitler

It's just been discovered that as well as writing a book, Adolf Hitler also wrote one of the first computer games, "Mein Kraft."

Blonde

Why can't blondes write comments on the jokes on this site?

Because they don't know what 2 X 4 is.

Draft

I picked up a document, and I started to feel cold.

I looked down at the document, and it read "DRAFT."