Work jokes
What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower?
Unemployed.
I C U P works on 88% of people.
Boss: Have a good day.
Me: *goes home*
Jimmy asks an elevator operator what he thinks of his job.
The operator shrugs and says, "It has its ups and downs!"
I've done a skele-TON of work to think of this joke. Trust me, I've got a FEW more jokes!
Memes
Took me about 15 seconds of staring in confusion to figure out how the illusion worked
I get paid more than $200 to $400 per hour for working online. I heard about this job 3 months ago, and after joining this, I have earned easily $30k from this without having online working skills. Simply give it a shot on the accompanying site...
Here is I started.............>> fixpay1.blogspot.com
A buddy and I checked out some books from a local library. When we returned them, he said, "Your sister works the returns, right?" I told him, "Yes, she does, and she will be here in about five minutes." He said, "Why don’t we put a cookbook in the women’s sports section?" I told him, "I love it!" So I picked out a Reese Witherspoon book.
Why did the squirrel ask for a pay raise?
He was paid peanuts.
Why couldn’t the peanut finish the project?
Work came to a grinding halt.
The circular saw asked the chainsaw, "When am I as big as you?"
The chainsaw would answer with, "When you cut down some things in your life. Like your owner."
The circular saw would reply with, "What?"
I saw a little kid cry. I went up to him and asked where his parents were. Jeez, I love working at the orphanage!
Yo mama so fat that when she saw Thanos and he tried to snap her out of existence, it didn't work, and he said, "Man, I quit!"
Why don't churches have Wi-Fi? Because they can't compete with an invisible force that actually works.
Teacher: Tim, where are your parents? It's been 15 minutes!
Tim (Orphan): Yeah um, they can't come.
Teacher: Why not?
Tim: They're too busy working in heaven.
Why did the man get fired from the calendar factory?
He only took a day off.
Why is Jupiter so big? Because it works out!
Why does Johnny Sins cover his pants, but it doesn't work?
Because the long, hard thing can't chirp down.
Tell it to your parents and friends!
Why did the bullet end up losing his job?
Because he got fired!
"What's the wifi password?"
"121i362"
"It's not working."
"What wifi are you trying to connect to?"
"The United Airline."
"We're in the World Trade Center, though."
What do you call security guards working outside of Samsung shops?
Guardians of the Galaxy. 🌌