Wordplay jokes
A missionary was caught by cannibals. He was tied up and thrown into a big pot. The cannibals were chopping up vegetables and throwing them into the pot with the missionary. When they lit the fire under the pot, the missionary said, "You can't stew me. I'm a friar."
What made his beats so bad?
His name.
What do you call a midget that waves? A microwave.
Mother: How is my little cookie doing?
Doctor: Your cookie is feeling crummy right now.
Mother: Really?
Doctor: But donโt worry. Things are about to get batter.
Mother: ๐โฅ๏ธ๐ช
Why did piglet go to the bathroom?
To search for Poo.
Why doesn't my egg want to crack?
Because I hate my egg-sistence.
If you take a cap off a bottle, is it decapitation?
If you take a cap off a bottle, is it decapitation?
Sorry guys, I tried. I tried harder this time. I'll try again. Sorry, I can't delete things.
Gay person to girl: Whatโs your favorite planet?
Girl: Penus-(penis)(venus), and what is yours?
Gay person: What else, it's Your Anus (Uranus)!๐
How does the bunny keep his fur neat?
With a hare brush.
What do you get when you cross a vacuum and a rooster?
A cock sucker.
I just shed my pants.
What's your favorite Fortnite location? Mine is Tilted Toers. ๐
Knock knock?
Who's there?
Willis.
Willis who?
Willis dick fit in yo mouth?!
How does Moses make his cup of tea?
He brews it.
What do you call a ghost's fart?
A spirit bomb.
Why is Joe cool?
What do you call a banana eating a banana?
Canabananalism.
I hear skeletons like to play the saxaBONE, though I think the tromBONE would be better, but tibia honest, both can be HUMERUS, wouldn't wanna hurt your funny bone, but I think your starting to get BONELY so I'll stop pulling your leg. Now get out before I give you a bad time.
What do you call a sad coffee?
Despesso.