Wordplay jokes
When I was young, I decided to go to a medical school.
At the entrance exam, we were asked to re-arrange letters
'PNEIS'
and form the name of an important human body part which is most useful when erect.
Those who answered 'SPINE' are doctors.
Me: If a skinny person goes skinny dipping, then what do fat people do?
My friend: Chunky dunks.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Lettuce in.
Lettuce in who?
Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
What's a prisoner's favorite game?
Hangman!
What do you call a girl with one leg? Ilean.
Why were 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 9. Then why was 10 afraid? Because it was between 9/11.
What do you think was going through the heads of the 9/11 victims on floor 43? Floor 44 💀💀
What do you call an act of “funny” discipline? A PUN-ishment!
What do a fisherman and a prostitute have in common?
They're both hookers.
What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair. 😎
I saw my friend hang themselves. My response was, I guess they wanted to hang with someone.
Why was the tamale in the hospital? Because he was a "tamalito."
Name an ant which is very heavy?
Eleph-ant.
Why did the girls sit on the clock?
To be on time.
One day I came to my mom and said, "MOM!!! I can make a butterfly!"
Mom: "No you can't..."
Me: *throws butter out the window* Me: "Look I made a butterfly!"
lol this isn't funny but I hope you liked it.
Herrit?
Q) What do you call Iron Man when he can't swim?
A) Robert Drowney Jr.
Laila has 69 boobs, but that is 222 too many. One day, she went on 51st Street to meet Dr. X, who ate all her boobs, and now she's boobless :)
6922251 x 8 = 55378008. Put the calculator upside down.
I was gonna tell a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort.
God: Why is the teenager so short?
Angel: I don't know.
God: I said, "Strong as a bear!"
Angel: No, you said, "Ass hair."
God: No, I didn't!
What's a depressed person's favorite drink? A dipresso espresso.