What's the last thing Asians hear from their parents? My money is my money. Your money is my money. Your wife's money is my money. Always remember that son.
Chuck Norris is the only man that ever had sex with my wife and survived. Oh how did I survive. Fortunately being her husband I was the 1 person she wasn't fucking.
Tony's wife had a divorce with Tony, she says she wants to be an independent woman
Day's later Tony's wife had an accident, guess who's crawling back for help 💀
What’d the fox say when he was asked to describe his wife?
“Hottie hottie hottie hoe!”
My ex-wife was deaf. She left me for a deaf friend of hers. To be honest, I should have seen the signs.
A husband walks into his house to find his wife watching Gordan Ramsey's F-king cooking show! Husband:STOP WATCHING THAT F-KING SHIT!!! YOU CAN'T COOK TO SAVE YOUR LIFE!!! WIFE: SO WHAT??! YOU WATCH PORN DON'T YOU??!!!!!!
A wife asks her husband: am I pretty or ugly? The husband awnsers her: pretty. The wife responds: thank yo- The husband interrupts her: PRETTY UGLY!
My wife said if I rape her again she would leave me. Why didn't anyone tell me it was that easy?
Luigi was dying had two sons Bruno was handsome but Alberto was ugly He said Maria tell me is the is Alberto my son Yes Luigi his wife said and he died happily Wife said thank God he didn’t ask about the other one !!
My wife and I watched The Perfect Murder together. Excellent movie, but what disturbed me though was my wife constantly taking notes.
How did Aniken get away with cheating?
By choking on his wife
Yesterday I purchased a world map And told my wife to throw a dart, and wherever it lands I will take her turns out we're spending three weeks behind the fridge
Daveon says "Oh wow, she's so beautiful." The doctor then says. "Yes, but sadly, your wife didn't make it..." Daveon then states "Give me the one my wife made then!"
My screen lock is my favorite picture of my wife. When I'm on a 14-hour shift, being miserable, hating my life... I pull out my phone and gaze at the picture of my wife. Then I realize it's better here than at home with her ass.
What made Adam and Eve's marriage perfect?
He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn't have to hear about his Mom's cooking.
One spelling mistake can completely ruin your marriage
I accidentally texted my wife “I’m having a wonderful time. I wish you were her.”
The pinnacle of loyalty is that an ant married an elephant, and after he died, she spent her entire life burying him :)
Q: How many men does it take to open up a beer? A: None. It should be opened by the time she brings it in.
Why did the woman cross the road?
What’s she doing out of the kitchen in the first place?
Roses are red Violets are blue Your wife needs Jon grudon too.
