When jokes
When you feel lonely, just watch a scary movie.
You won't feel lonely anymore :(
I would roast you, but the mirrors do when you look at them.
Why do I have to go to a shooting range when I can go to school and do it for free?
When Kenney goes down on his mom, does he taste vegetable or fish?
The orphan started crying at school when he got suspended and had to go home.
When I place a Amazon prime order
When the school shooter pulls the fire alarm, and the autistic kid thinks it’s a rave party.
A good woman is like a good cup of coffee, especially when it’s strong and hot with a little bit of cream in it.
I'm so depressed that when I smile, my Face ID doesn't recognize me.
I'm so depressed that when I smile my Face ID won't work.
Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? - Everywhere.
During a discussion at Sunday school, a nun asks the children what they think God takes you by when you die. A kid responds, "I think God takes you by your feet, because once I walked into my parents' room and my mom's feet were in the air and she was screaming, "Oh God, I'm coming!!!"
What's the difference between you and a fridge? The fridge doesn't moan when I put my meat in.
when Ted Bundy found out he was getting the death penalty, he was pretty shocked...
How do you know when a football player has been to jail?
When he goes in a tight end and comes out a wide receiver.
When I was in 4th grade, we wrote letters to kids in the hospital. I wrote: "It is a bumpy road but soon it will be a straight path." Not many people know I was talking about their heart monitor.
I bought my son a fridge for Christmas. I can't wait to see his face light up when he opens it.
Why did the girl rage badly when she got an D- on her essay?
Because the teacher said she missed all her periods.
Q: What did the cannibal shout when his friend fell on the floor?
A: "FIVE SECOND RULE!"
What's the difference between a feminist and Hitler?
Both were good at starting wars, only difference was Hitler knew when to kill himself afterwards.
A German soldier is walking down the street during a hail storm when a lady suddenly falls over after being hit. He, along with a few others, walk over to her. One man asks, "What happened?" and the soldier replies, "Hail hit her."