Whats jokes

What happens to a baby when you let it run loose? It can't cause it can't run yet.

What happens to chickens that get kidnapped by rapists?

They get choked.

What’s the difference between a barcode and Rachel Sutherland’s wrist?

Nothing, they both get scanned for a fresh new pack of razor blades.

Me scrolling through jokes that sum up my life, starts crying.

My friend: What’s wrong?

Me: Nothing, it's just so funny. Lol😂🤣😂

Why do orphans play GTA?

Because they need to know what it’s like to be wanted.

What do me and a casino machine have in common? It takes about 50 pumps to get to the jackpot.

A couple and their friends were riding their tricycle, and one wheel fell off. They discussed what to do, and finally the friend said, "Why don't you just use me?" The boyfriend said, "Why did I not think of using the third wheel?"

What do a school shooter and a person with gum have in common?

One's the pull it out everyone wants to be their friend.

2 weeks here.

What do dicks and popsicles have in common?

They both like to be sucked on, and they sometimes choke you.

What did the mouse 🐭 say when his friend broke their teeth?

Hard cheese! 🧀😂

What did the tree wear to the pool party 🥳?

Swimming trunks.

What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?

Aye, matey!

What do you say to a 1 legged hitch hiker?

Hop in!

What did the green grape say to the purple grape?

"Breathe... Breathe..."

Yesterday I bought my daughter a cat, but accidentally hit her with the car today. I have no idea what to do with the cat now.

What’s the worst thing about being suicidal?

The school shooter will always spare you.

What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves!

Nah, just kidding... He still hasn't unwrapped his present.

What do you get when you dip a duck in blue paint?

A very pissed duck.

Little Sally comes home from school one day and says to her mom, "Mommy, mommy, you won’t believe it! Little Johnny just pulled out his PP in class." The mother responded, "Well, what did it look like?" Sally said, "It looks like a peanut." The mother said, "Oh, it was small." "No, it was salty," said Sally.

What was Hitler's favorite thing to do to pass the time?

Smoking.