Whats jokes
What do you call yourself when you fist a midget?
A ventriloquist.
Whatโs missing from an orphan's iPad?
The home button.
What has two wings and an arrow?
The Chinese telephone, wing wing, arrow.
What starts with "N" and ends with "G?"
Nothing.
Whatโs the difference between a firefighter and Snoop Dogg?
Snoop Dogg inhaled less smoke during 9/11.
Memes
The mistletoaster
What do you call an emo kid with light-up shoes? A human chandelier.
What do you call a disabled orphan?
A left over vegetables.
When your baby is stillborn and you have a funeral, what song should you never play?
Alphaville - "Forever Young."
Q: What do you call deaf Magic Johnson?
A: Hearing Aids.
What's the difference between a newborn baby and an orphan after a rugby match?
They both come out bloody and crying, but at least one gets picked up.
Why is Afghanistan good at chess? They take the rooks out fast.
What is the biggest fear of an American soldier taking a piss in a bush during the Vietnam war? His manhood will be chopped off.
Guy 1: Hey, can you stop making 9/11 jokes? My dad died during it.
Guy 2: Sorry, I will stop. What was your dad?
Guy 1: The pilot. He saw a KFC and wanted it, so, well, you know.
Hey, 2nd Amendmenters! Wanna know what gun Jesus used during his time?
What?
A nail gun!
What's the difference between a refrigerator and a gay person...
It don't moan when u put milk inside.
What do you call a bowling ball that falls from the sky and knocks down all the bowling pins?
An airstrike.
Do you guys know what KFC stands for? It stands for kidnapping foster children.
What does an orphan wish they could do?
Wish happy Mother's Day and Father's Day.
Why do orphans get confused about ancient Egypt? Because they wouldnโt know what a mummy is.
What do alien moms like to drink? Starbucks.
What's the square root of 2001?
9/11