Whats jokes
What do you call a gay threesome?
A Sloppy Joe.
A heavily pregnant woman is in an accident and gives birth to twins while comatose. Upon awakening some days later, the doctors tell her that her brother Tom filled out the birth certificates while she was out.
"Oh no, Tom's an idiot, what did he name my daughter?" she asked the nurse.
"Denise."
"That's not a bad name. And what did he name the boy?"
"Tom Junior."
What does a phone and a grandma have in common? They both die.
What's the difference between them? If you shove something up your grandma's ass, she won't come back to life.
What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a Mercedes?
I don’t have a Mercedes.
What's the difference between an ISIS training center and a school?
I don't know, I just fly the drone.
Memes
what?😦
What do you call Stephen Hawking on Mars? Mars Rover.
What's an alien's favorite computer key?
The space bar!
what's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? the trampoline doesn't cave in when i jump on it.
What’s the difference between Nelson Mandela and Paul Walker?
They both died at 95.
What can you say both at a funeral and during sex?
This would be much better if you were alive.
What do you call a kid who's been kidnapped?
Well, her name's Sally, so I guess... Sally. My main concern is getting her out of the freezer.
What's the difference between a refrigerator and a gay guy? You have to ask permission before stuffing it with meat.
What did the green light say to the red light? - Don't look, I'm changing!
What do you call an idiotic cow?
A mis-steak!
What's the difference between Clint Eastwood and anal sex?
One will make your day, and the other will make your hole weak.
What does the 'w' in Africa stand for? Water.
What kind of woman does Bill Cosby like the most?
The “cold and passed out” kind.
What's better than sex with your 12 year old sister?
Rolling her over and pretending it's your 10 year old brother.
What do you call a Mexican that hung him self? a pinata
What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? I can't peanut butter my dick up your ass.