Whats jokes
What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?
A flat major.
What sound does a 747 make when it bounces?
Boeing boeing boeing.
What do you call a pig that does karate?
PORK-CHOP
What's an Emo's favorite drink?
Water, JK it's cyanide.
What did Hitler feel about all the jokes about him? Führereous.
What's the difference between England and a tea bag? -- The tea bag stays longer in a cup.
Three blondes were taking a walk when they stumbled on some tracks. They argued on what the tracks came from. One of them said, "it's a deer." The other said, "No it's a coyote." The last one was going to give her thoughts, but that was when the train hit them.
What did the maxi pad say to the fart? "You are the wind beneath my wings."
What is sprinkled around the Pokémon floor? Oh right. Ash's ashes.
What's the difference between a smart blonde and a dinosaur?
The dinosaur once existed.
What did the priest say to the other in the orphanage?
"Let us prey together."
what do you call a chicken who crossed the road?........suicidal.
what did the pedophile say to the kid?
"Roses are red, my name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van."
What do you call a 5-year-old with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.
Two gay guys, two lesbians, and two pedophiles have a race.
What is the order of finish?
1. Lesbians. Doing 69 the whole way.
2. Pedophiles. Coming in a little behind.
3. Gay guys. Still packing their shit.
In death, what is the only organ in a woman's body to remain warm?
My dick.
What do you do when you finish a magazine at the hospital?
You reload and keep shooting.
What kind of vacuum does an abortion center use? A: Dyson.
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family photo.
So, an Irish man is walking his poodle, and his buddy comes running up to him saying there’s a new pub in town and they’re giving out free pints.
So the man picks up his dog and runs like hell to the bar. But the bar owner stops him and says, "Sorry, you can’t go in." The Irish man says, "Why can’t I go in?" "Well, you have a dog, sir, and that sign over there says no dogs allowed. You’re going to have to leave him outside." Well, the Irish man thinks quick and says, "I’m blind; it’s a seeing eye dog." The owner says, "That’s ridiculous. A seeing eye dog would be a German shepherd or golden Labrador or something like that." The Irish man says, "Well, what kind of dog did they give me??"😂