Whats jokes
What did one iceberg say to the other iceberg as the Titanic went by?
"I'd smash that."
What is the most played game in Africa?
The Hunger Games.
I bought a guh on the weekend.
(what's a guh?)
GUHZZLE DEEZ NUTS! 🥜 🔩 🌰
What do you call a pig that does karate?
PORK-CHOP
What sound does a 747 make when it bounces?
Boeing boeing boeing.
A man was in a courtroom. The judge said, "What should this man's punishment be?"
A random guy yelled, "Off with his head!"
The judge said, "He shall give head to every man in this room."
The guy yelled, "Wait, that's not what I said!"
What is an Iraqi kid's favorite game?
Minesweeper.
What's the problem with 9/11 jokes?
They are just two plane.
What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?
A flat major.
What's an Emo's favorite drink?
Water, JK it's cyanide.
Q) What do you call Iron Man when he can't swim?
A) Robert Drowney Jr.
This is NOT my joke. I found it on Google. It's a texting joke.
Mom: Son, your grandma just passed away LOL.
Son: Mom, what do you mean LOL? That means laughing out loud.
Mom: Oh no, I thought that meant lots of love. I have to text everyone back!!!!
What did the maxi pad say to the fart? "You are the wind beneath my wings."
Three blondes were taking a walk when they stumbled on some tracks. They argued on what the tracks came from. One of them said, "it's a deer." The other said, "No it's a coyote." The last one was going to give her thoughts, but that was when the train hit them.
What's the difference between England and a tea bag? -- The tea bag stays longer in a cup.
What is sprinkled around the Pokémon floor? Oh right. Ash's ashes.
What's the difference between a smart blonde and a dinosaur?
The dinosaur once existed.
What did the priest say to the other in the orphanage?
"Let us prey together."
So, an Irish man is walking his poodle, and his buddy comes running up to him saying there’s a new pub in town and they’re giving out free pints.
So the man picks up his dog and runs like hell to the bar. But the bar owner stops him and says, "Sorry, you can’t go in." The Irish man says, "Why can’t I go in?" "Well, you have a dog, sir, and that sign over there says no dogs allowed. You’re going to have to leave him outside." Well, the Irish man thinks quick and says, "I’m blind; it’s a seeing eye dog." The owner says, "That’s ridiculous. A seeing eye dog would be a German shepherd or golden Labrador or something like that." The Irish man says, "Well, what kind of dog did they give me??"😂
Two gay guys, two lesbians, and two pedophiles have a race.
What is the order of finish?
1. Lesbians. Doing 69 the whole way.
2. Pedophiles. Coming in a little behind.
3. Gay guys. Still packing their shit.