Whats jokes

Teacher: What does a pig give you?

Little Johnny: Bacon.

Teacher: Good, what does the sheep give you?

Little Johnny: Wool.

Teacher: What does the fat cow give you?

Little Johnny: Homework and says "leave motherf*cker".

What do you call a woman who says she can do anything a man can do?

Wrong.

What college can Stephen Hawking not attend?

"Stand" Ford University. :3

What does a blondie and a shotgun have in common?

Give them a cock and they're ready to blow.

What is Osama bin Laden's favorite football team?

The New York Jets.

What's the difference between a black dad and a boomerang? A boomerang comes back.

Doctor: "I have good news and I have worse news." Patient: "Well, what's the bad news?" Doctor: "You have one day left to live." Patient: "What news could possibly be worse?" Doctor: "I've been trying to contact you since yesterday!"

It isn't really rape if you speak different languages. I mean, how is the man supposed to know what she is saying? Those could be tears of joy and screams of pleasure.

What 3 words started Jeffery Dahmer's cannibalism?

This isn't ketchup.

What do you call a burning church?

Holy smokes.

What do you call a blind German?

A not see.

What do you do after your girlfriend with two broken legs dumps you?

Take her wheelchair, she'll come crawling back.

What's the difference between a priest and a rabbi? The rabbi cuts it off, and the priest sucks it off.

What do you call an angry Texan?

A Confederate leader.

What did the Mexican man say when his house fell on him?

"Get off me homes."

What is a Mexican's favorite sport?

Cross country.

What was the Roman Empire cut in half by?

A pair of Caesars.

What did the soldier say when he sees a terrorist in a wheelchair?

RC-XD incoming.

What is a Mexican’s favorite band?

Twenty Juan Pilots.

What objects have the most gravitational force?

A Lambo and a gold digger.