Whats jokes
What did the cake say to the fork?
"Do you want a piece of me!!!"
What's the difference between light and hard?
It's easy to get to sleep with a light on.
What's the difference between my phone and my sister?
I actually give a damn if my phone dies.
What do you call a smurf with no arms or legs?
A paintball.
What has more letters than the alphabet? -- The post office.
What do McDonald's and a priest have in common? They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns.
What do you call a gay man that is not physically handicapped that performs blowjobs on gay men that are physically handicapped?
Caregiver.
What would you find on a haunted beach?
A sand-witch!
"Hey guys, I'm a new jokester, remember my name as I'll be making a lot more!!! P.S. They will be much better than this one!"
What's the best thing about abuse jokes? The punchline.
What did the math book say to the other math book?
Wanna hear my problems?
Teacher: What does a pig give you?
Little Johnny: Bacon.
Teacher: Good, what does the sheep give you?
Little Johnny: Wool.
Teacher: What does the fat cow give you?
Little Johnny: Homework and says "leave motherf*cker".
What do you call a woman who says she can do anything a man can do?
Wrong.
My mom told me a joke she made 13 years ago, but she didn't tell me what it was... Anyways, I'm turning 14 next month.
What does a blondie and a shotgun have in common?
Give them a cock and they're ready to blow.
What's the difference between a black dad and a boomerang? A boomerang comes back.
What college can Stephen Hawking not attend?
"Stand" Ford University. :3
What is Osama bin Laden's favorite football team?
The New York Jets.
Doctor: "I have good news and I have worse news." Patient: "Well, what's the bad news?" Doctor: "You have one day left to live." Patient: "What news could possibly be worse?" Doctor: "I've been trying to contact you since yesterday!"
What do you call a midget with autism?
A weetard.
I was playing a tennis match against a girl and said, "I will fuck you up." She said, "Try me." So that's exactly what I did, and I won by forfeit as she ended up running away crying.