Whats jokes
In what ways do nuns and hoes have something in common?
They both worship on their knees. They are both creatures of habit. They both take vows of poverty and obedience. Once chosen, neither can leave the life. They both swallow their hosts.
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson decide to go on a camping trip. After dinner and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night, and go to sleep.
Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend.
"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
Watson replied, "I see millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?"
Watson pondered for a minute.
"Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets." "Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo." "Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three." "Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant." "Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow." "What does it tell you, Holmes?"
Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke: "Watson, you idiot. Someone has stolen our tent!"
What do you call two Mexicans in a sleeping bag?
A Twix.
I bought a gun from Walmart today. I guess they knew what I was going to do with it, because when I pulled the gun on the cashier, I realized the firing mechanism was in reverse.
What do you call a rich Chinese man? Ching Ching.
What's the difference between yes and no...
Nothing.
What did Earth say to the other planets?
"You guys have no life!"
What's the difference between a paycheck and your penis?
You don't have to beg your wife to blow up the paycheck.
What's the hardest part of running through a field of dead babies?
My boner.
Little Johnny walked into the bathroom while his dad was taking a dump. As soon as Little Johnny walked in, his dad let out a big FART! Little Johnny said, “WHAT WAS THAT?” His dad said, “That was the sound of the north wind.” The next day his teacher asked the class, “What’s the direction of the north wind?” Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher called on him and he said, “TEACH IT’S MY DADDY’S BOOTY!”
What does Michael Jackson do with his meat? "Just beat it". His song btw lol.
What do you find in Jeffrey Dahmer's shower?
Heads and shoulders.
What do you call a sneaky child molester?
Incogpedo.
What do you call a group of emos?
Limited Edition.
What do you call a suicide bomber in a wheelchair?
An RCXD (remote control explosive).
Q: What is the difference between Austin Matthews and a priest?
A: One looks like a pedophile and one is a pedophile.
What is the coolest bath bomb for emos?
A toaster.
What's the difference between an emo kid and a leaf? Only the leaf reaches the ground.
What is the difference between an orphan and a blind kid?
They both can’t see their parents. 😂😂😂😂😂
What did Michael Jackson say to the child sitting on him?
“Just beat it! Just beat it!”