Whats jokes
What did the ass say to the joke?
"You crack me up!"
What do asses and secrets have in common?
Both are better when not leaked!
What is a terrorist's favorite song?
"Pumped Up Kicks."
A: What did the podiatrist say to the double amputee?
Q: Sorry, but I can't help you.
My history teacher asked my class what time they would go back to just to see what happened.
I said I'd go back to Hitler's childhood to tell him the lies that he becomes the ruler of the world by starting the Nazis, and leave his death out of the discussion.
This is two heads.
Deaf. "Deep water." ""
- "78 years."
Are you interested again? ""
"If you go ... you are there."
"No. 85 is good."
What is the most important value? It does not take cheese.
What does the EPA issue when a person stinks up a room with their smelly farts?
Air quality alert code brown!
What did one slave owner say to the other slave owner when he couldn’t find his slave?
Don’t worry, I’ll rope him in.
What do the initials "MAD" stand for?
Mothers Against Democrats.
What's the difference between someone with dystonia and someone with misophonia?
One makes the annoying noises, while the other hates the annoying noises.
What did the farmer say when he saw his chicken cross the road?
"No, my cock!"
My mom told me that my friend Paul is coming over, and he is going to sleep over, so I was happy.
The next day, I ask my mom, "Where's the dog?" My mom asks me, "What dog?"
Then I said to my mom, "I heard Paul say, 'Do you want it doggy?' and you said 'Yeah.'"
What does “JETS” stand for?
Jihadis Eradicating The Skyscrapers.
What did the mic say to the rapper?
"Don’t DROP me, bro!"
What do you call a rapper with bad credit?
Lil Borrow.
Say what you want about Jeffery Dahmer, but he always managed to get a head.
Q. What did the United Healthcare CEO say after he got shot? A. I don't know. I don't own a Ouija board.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple gets picked.
What’s one thing a man can do that a woman can’t?
Sit down and shut up.
What do you call two guys fighting over a slut?
Tug of whore.