Whats jokes
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
What can't a sniper say to his wife?
"I missed you."
What do you give a dog with a fever?
Mustard, it's the best thing for a hot dog!
One day I told a kid what 2 x 12 was. He said he didn't know. I said let's go to my basement and figure it out. He is still in my basement trying to do the equation.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo?
Head and Shoulders.
Bro: I’m not crazy. What he does during facetime:
What do you call a flying pig?
Fiction.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef! Hahahahahaha!
My mom told me to get dressed, and I said, "For what? Are we going to the rodeo?"
What's the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?
A rooster clucks defiance!
What did the chicken say when he saw a human running around uncontrollably?
"It's running around like a chicken with its head cut off!"
Q. What kind of school does an ice cream man go to?
A. Sunday school!
Psst! Don't understand? Well, "Sunday" sounds like "Sundae." Get it now? Nope? Sorry. Plus, it's an ice cream homophone joke.
What's the difference between Madeleine McCann and a boomerang?
The boomerang is guaranteed to come back.
What did you call a school that got blown up?
What do you say to your pet when you're super tired, slow, and worn out?
"I'm totally dogging it today..."
What would you name a detective if he didn't already have a name?
Cassie.
Get it?
What did the window say to the door?
"What are you squeaking about? I'm the one with the panes!"
Get it?
What did the undershirt say to the T-shirt when they were fighting?
"If you don't shut up right now, you're gonna lose your shirt!!!"
Get it?
What do you call a crazy-in-every-way sister?
A sissy.
What’s your favorite food? Chode in the hole?
What is the difference between chocolate and sex?
I would rather eat the chocolate first and then make love.