Whats jokes

What's the best part about a dead prostitute?

The second hour is free.

What does an Al Qaeda terrorist and a flexible man have in common?

They can blow themselves up.

What do you call it when you baptize a Mexican? Bean dip!

Quiet kid: "I'm home!"

Parents: "What did you learn at school today?"

Quiet kid: "I've learned that I've had enough!"

What did me and my uncle call hide and seek? Naked and afraid.

What is the difference between an orphan and a criminal?

Criminals are wanted.

What’s the last thing Tickle Me Elmo receives before leaving the factory?

Two test tickles.

Q. What's a disabled person's favorite band?

A. System of a Down's syndrome.

What is a Mexican's favorite sport?

Cross-country!!!

What do you call a group of depressed kids?

Suicide Squad!

What does a skeleton put on his roof?

Shin-gulls.

What's simultaneously up and down?

A retard on a plane.

What's the difference between a hippie chick and a hockey player? The hockey player showers after 3 periods.

What does a priest hold on to when having sex?

He holds on to the schoolbag.

A man goes into heaven and there he meets Jesus. He asks Jesus what that broken clock is there for. Jesus says, "That is Mother Teresa's clock, it has never moved because she has never lied." "There is Abraham Lincoln's clock. He has lied twice so it has moved twice." "Where is Donald Trump's?" asks the man. Jesus answers, "It is in my office, I am using it as a ceiling fan."

What planet did Hitler hate the most?

Jewpiter.

You know what they say about dark humor: it hits harder than a drunk parent.

What are the differences between Santa and Joe Biden?

The kids actually want to sit on Santa’s lap.

What's the difference between a phone and a girl? You can turn it off whenever you want.

What’s black, white, and red all over? A nun on her period.