Whats jokes
What does your first football game and your first time having sex have in common?
You were bloody and battered but at least your dad came.
A boy went to a costume party with a girl on his back. Someone asked him what he was supposed to be. He answered, "A turtle."
"Then why do you have a girl on your back?" the guy asked again.
The boy answered, "It's Michelle."
What’s the difference between a nose and an orphan? A nose gets picked more.
My friend: "Yo, stupid."
Me: "Is that right? And what exactly have you done in your lifetime that makes you Einstein?"
My friend: *rolls eyes* and says, "Whatever."
Me: "Keep on rolling them; you might find your brain in there."
What's the difference between an American 12-year-old and an African 12-year-old? About 40 pounds.
What's the difference between humans and bullets?
Humans miss John Lennon.
What happens when Stephen Hawking dies?
The Windows shutdown sound plays.
Two wrongs don't make a right, but what do two Wrights make?
The first airplane.
What has 4 wheels, 2 legs, and loves his shoulder?
Stephen Hawking.
Kid: Hey, what’s black and sneaky!
Social studies teacher: Harriet Tubman.
What's the difference between Jesus and the baby I have in my basement?
Jesus died a virgin.
What is the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One smashes open when you hit it with a sledgehammer, and the other is a watermelon.
What do you call an Asian prostitute?
Suck Mi Dong.
What’s the difference between a doctor and a pedophile?
The doctor doesn’t enjoy giving physicals.
What is Bill Cosby's favorite poem? Roses are red, my cum is blue, I'll wait till your asleep to rape you.
What is Hitler's favorite book? "Hitler and the chamber of secrets."
What do planets like to read? Comet books!
What do computers and white kids have in common? They don't have trouble shooting.
What do you call two Mexicans fighting? Juan on Juan.
What's worse than depression & suicide?
Easy: LIVING. Everyday you wish you were dead but then reality hits you in the face that you're still alive and have to suffer living.
Pretend or not pretend, we have to decide everyday even if we don't pretend no one will notice :) no one ever does :). Living is the problem to everything. We get depression cuz of it and so much. Why can't we just die :)?