Weather jokes
How do you make someone in Africa disappointed?
Sing "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head."
Brrr, it's fucking cold outside, aye? What do you guys want for Christmas? A sweet video game? Maybe a cool action figure? Oh, how about the latest phone!
Who me? Oh, I guess... I wish snow could melt as fast as the snowflakes that downvote good jokes! Merry Christmas, ya filthy animals!
What do you call a Chinese man in the summer heat? Boi Ling.
Yo mama so stupid, when they said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a bowl!
Yo mama's so stupid, when they said it was chilly outside, she grabbed a bowl.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
Summer wasn't too bad either.
Is there anything worse than when it's raining cats and dogs? Yes, hailing taxis.
What was the weather forecast when the planes hit the World Trade Center? Partly cloudy with scattered passengers!
A few days after her husband’s death, a widow accidentally receives an email from a man waiting for his wife in Spain.
The email reads: "Dearest Wife, just got checked in. Everything [is] prepared for your arrival tomorrow. P. S. It’s really hot down here!"
Why don't Indians like snow?
Because it's white all over their land.
It's been raining for days. My wife is totally depressed. She keeps looking through the window. If this keeps up, I'll have to let her in.
I’m not a weatherman, but I’m expecting a few more inches tonight.
What did the beer can say to the other? "Open me, please!"
What did the coconut say to the other? "Crack!"
Why did the jalapeño cross the road? I got spicy!
Why did the hubcap cross the road? Crack!
Why jazz, Jr. Get to the other side of the creek? Don’t break a leg!
What did the tornado cross the road? Let’s spin again!
Why did the turkey get to the other side of the creek? Don’t break a leg!
What did the bunny get to the side of the road? Get furry!
Dews?
You used to be someone’s sunshine, but sorry, the climate changed. 😂😂😂😂
Yo mama is so retarded, they tell her it was gonna be chilly outside, she went and got a bowl!
When you tell an Asian kid it’s raining cats and dogs and he’s like, “Just open your mouth and close your eyes!”
Expectation: "Brr, I’m cold!" "Here brother! I’ll give you my jacket, I don’t want you to be cold!"
Reality: "Brr, I’m cold!" "Well, damn bro, I can’t control the weather."
Yo momma's like a cloud, when she disappears, it's a beautiful sunny day.
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?
Hold on to your nuts, this ain't no ordinary blowjob.