Weather jokes
Why did the rapper become a weatherman?
To predict the HEAT of his next single.
Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?
For some sick DRIZZLE on his tracks.
Why was the rapper always calm during storms?
Because he had a good FLOW.
Why was the rapper always cold?
Because his lyrics were too ICY!
Why did the rapper carry an UMBRELLA?
Because he heard there was a 50% chance of "Lil Wayne."
Why was the rapper always calm during a storm?
Because he knew how to RIDE THE FLOW.
How does a rapper greet someone on a cold day?
"Yo, is the temperature Ice Cube, or Vanilla Ice?"
How does a rapper stay warm in the winter?
With some HOT TRACKS!
How do rappers stay cool in the summer?
They drop ICE COLD rhymes.
Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?
In case of ill rhymes!
Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?
For when he made it RAIN in the club.
If Mexico is an unredeemable shithole, then how come the Republicans' favorite senator, Ted Cruz, ran to Mexico as fast as he could after a little bit of snow in his home?
what do you call an American looking at cloud shapes?
Oppenheimer
How is a marriage like a hurricane?
In the beginning, there’s a lot of sucking and blowing, but at the end, you lose your house.
I went to catch the fog this morning, I mist.
What’s the difference between a Black person and snow tires?
Snow tires still work after you take the chains off.
When can an elephant use an umbrella and not get wet?
When it's not raining.
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?
Hold on to your nuts, this ain't no ordinary blow job!
How do you make someone in Africa disappointed?
Sing "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head."
Brrr, it's fucking cold outside, aye? What do you guys want for Christmas? A sweet video game? Maybe a cool action figure? Oh, how about the latest phone!
Who me? Oh, I guess... I wish snow could melt as fast as the snowflakes that downvote good jokes! Merry Christmas, ya filthy animals!