Weapon jokes
Gun + Backpack = Fun!
I impaled my son with a pitchfork...
He looks very sharp.
Russians think they are tougher than Americans. Here are some reasons for the Russians out here reading this:
1. USA was NEVER invaded!
2. USA never commits as many war crimes as Russia does!
3. USA made the first nuclear weapon so yeah shove that up your ass, Russians!
4. Our soldiers don’t rape kids.
5. We have more allies than you.
6. We are smaller but stronger.
7. Random civilians in the USA have stronger guns than Russian military does!
I gave a blind kid a gun and told him it was a hairdryer.
How do you think Julius Caesar killed his enemies?..
With a pair of Caesars! 😂😂👌
George, when I saw your face, I had to shoot you with a Nerf gun. If you died, wimp.
What takes knowledge to do and also takes knowledge away?
Looking down the barrel and pulling the trigger. 😂
Officer: "Stay back soldiers, minefield!"
Soldier: "Let's clear the field!"
Officer: "Ok!"
*silence*
*explosion*
Why are there no guns in China? They might do some "ting wong!"
Spongebob: Easy now, you try first. Get a jar.
Patrick: *picks up nuke*
Spongebob: Patrick, that's a nuke!
Patrick: Yes.
Nuke: *boom*
I couldn’t quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it hit me!
Are you a bullet?
*gets shot*
Russia went from N-95 to M-16 real quick...
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
Africa has every gun except for what?
A water gun.
Why does the army take orphans as fighter jet pilots?
Because homing missiles don’t work on them.
What do you do when a French kid steals your pencil?
Load your MP-40 and tell him that you give him a history lesson on WWII.
What does a sad cowboy and a supernatural fan have in common?
Both want to put a Winchester in their mouth.
A man walked into a bar with an AK-47 with a 50-round mag and yelled out, "Who the fuck fucked my wife?" Everyone was quiet.
One man at the back stood up and called, "Sorry mate, but I don't think you have enough bullets."
How do you win an argument against an emo kid?
Give him a gun, he'll just shoot himself.