When you kill people in a war, it's perfectly fine, but when it's a school, everyone has a problem with it, wth.
War Jokes
"Why do people call Americans excessive?"
"It was probably because of WWII."
"Oh, you mean the war where America responded to the destruction of several ships and a harbor and the deaths of a little over a thousand by completely flattening two cities and killing hundreds of thousands of people?"
The point of war is not to die for your country, but to make the fresh recruit on the enemy's side die for his.
*Loud explosion inside the tank*
"Where's the commander?" "He's gone." "Where has he gone?" "All over the place."
Say what you want about Hitler, he wasn't all that bad. After all, he killed Hitler.
My Japanese friend told me a Pearl Harbor joke. I told him he bombed it.
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Seven’s been worried about six even since he left Afghanistan. Every time 6 closes his eyes, he sees the war and hears the gunshots. He sees the blood, the killing, the death, and soldiers falling. When he looks at seven, he remembers when they were forced to eat their own flesh to not starve in those caves. He sees the war and the flashbacks will come back forever, burned into his soul and mind.
How do you become with NATO? Promise no more world wars by secretly performing military practices behind their back.
Don't make Iran jokes. My mom died by a rocket launcher. She was the best sharp shooter in the Iranian army.
There was an enemy with a machine gun.
My commander said, "Un-arm the enemy."
So I ran over to the enemy and chopped his arms off.
What did the orphans do when the bombs drop?
They said, "Allahu Akbar."
What did Paul Revere yell during a full moon?
The British are cumming! The British are cumming!
Q: When and where was the biggest BBQ ever?
A: Hiroshima, Japan 1946.
We need more women in the military! They can bleed for weeks and still not die!
How does Hitler tie his shoes?
Into little Nazis.
Why are Americans so bad at chess? Because they already lost two towers.
What first went through Sally's mind when the Nazis came? - A bullet.
What’s the difference between prison and concentration camps?
At least you don’t die when you shower.
My uncle died on nine eleven... he was the best pilot in Iraq.
I don't like it when people make jokes about 9/11, because we lost 19 great patriots that day.