Violence jokes
I'll never forget my mother's last words: "What are you doing with that sledgehammer?"
How do you make an 8 year old girl cry twice?
Wipe your bloody cock off on her favorite teddy bear.
My favorite sex position is the “JFK,” I splatter all over her as she screams to get out of the car 😂
What do you do when you're bored?
I beat up orphans.
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
A person in NYC is shot every 5 minutes. Poor guy!
Person: So you know that person's name you say when you make a hoop, well he's dead.
Friend: Yeah, John Wilkes Booth.
Person: How dare you say that he killed Abraham Lincoln?
Friend: Terrible guy but he never missed a shot!
I will never forget my mother and father's last words.
"Where the Sam hell did you get a grenade?"
What did the 1.8 nanosecond old baby get for his birthday?
Nailed to a puppy falling on a buzz saw being crushed in a hydraulic press while being set on fire.
I raped a disabled child.
I think she's too far gone to repair now.
My wife wanted to make a joke about domestic abuse, but I beat her to it.
How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?
Well, it's not 8 because my basement is still dark.
*The doctor asking why I've broken 19 bones in the past week*
*My abusive mum- Go on, tell him!*
Well what am I gonna do now...
What's the difference between a penis and a gun?
A child doesn't cry when a gun goes off in its mouth.
If you see a woman get raped, just walk away. Don't bother helping. They're independent women, after all.
A student got a bad letter grade, so the next day he came back with his own letter grade in his backpack: an A-K47.
School is a lot like boot camp. The only difference is that you don't have to get deployed to get shot at.
Q: Why did Sally get beat up?
A: She couldn’t fight back.
Do nothing about people falling down the stairs, it will keep happening.
Put razor blades on the stairs, it will be their last time falling down the stairs.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because someone booted her in the face. 🤣🤣
When you decide to turn your high school into your personal shooting range, but you don’t give any proper notice except for a bullet to the head...