Violence jokes
What do you call a suicide bomber in a wheelchair?
An RC-XD.
What animal has five legs? A pitbull returning from a playground.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
It depends on how hard you throw them.
I’m gonna kick some gum and chew some ass... but I’m all out of ass.
Boi, you can't be talking because if someone punched you in the face, you will be the one to apologize.
What’s the worst thing about being suicidal?
The school shooter will always spare you.
How do you kill a retard?
Give them a knife and say, "Who's special?"
When the teacher gives me an F on my exam,
but I have an AK-47 in my backpack.
*Is honestly the best policy.*
Teacher: What month is it?
Quiet kid: AUG-ust.
Classroom: Visible concern.
Someone threw a cup at my eye. I told 911 that I was mugged.
Roses are red, violets are blue,
Get in the van, or I'll kill you.
Why is it okay to hit an orphan?
It’s not like they can tell their parents.
I took my mother-in-law out yesterday morning,
It's great being a sniper.
A kid told me to go get a dad, so I punched the kid. He went to tell his parents. Oh wait, he can't, 'cause he's an orphan, and orphans have no parents.
A guy was dying after getting stabbed in a church. He said to the priest, "Please say a prayer for me," and the priest said, "I ain’t got nun left." Then he died.
How did the lesbian die? Homicide.
Teacher: What comes after C?
Me: Ooh! Ooh! C4!
Teacher: Umm, ok... but still what comes after A?
Me: AK47!!!
Teacher thought: Oh hell na.
Teacher: What comes after X?
Me: Xplosin.
1 second later, bomb goes off. Idk.
These jokes are a little too explosive, if you ask me.
Why do orphans have no bruises?
Because they have no dad to beat them.
I say, punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?