Violence jokes
My name is Dan, I wear white Vans, I have a gun, get in the van!
Bf: "Roses are red, violets are blue, you're my bf and I luv you."
Gf: "I luv u too."
Bf: "But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, I heard you were cheating, I'll knock off your head."
Gf: "Ah, about that..."
I was fucking this girl, and I started to make her cry.
She mumbled things and squirmed, but I couldn't hear her through the gag I put in her mouth.
What do rapists like to suck?
The life out of their victim.
Where do rape victims buy their clothes from?
The kids section.
As a murderer, I stabbed a man after infiltrating his house. His wife came in and saw me. She fell into tears. I got up and said, "Drama queen!"
What do 9/10 people enjoy?
Gang rape.
Why the hell would I go to a shooting range when I could go to school and do it for free?
When the school shooter finally leaves your classroom, but then the autistic kid next to you's sketchers light up.
There's going to be a party at the orphanage tonight. I'm bringing a gun.
Someone at school judged my grammar.
I judged theirs by the terms "school" and "rifle range" being mixed up the next day.
What's better than swinging a baby around on a rope?
Stopping it with a shovel.
Australian says to American: why do you have such bad gun laws?
American: Self defense.
Australian: Self defense against 50 innocent children?
I say 1, 2, 3, all the kids bullied me, but now they're not so cool, cuz I shot up the school.
Two teenagers were raping an 11-year-old girl in an alley, so I stepped in to help. The little bitch didn’t stand a chance against the three of us.
If you’re bored, go punch an orphan. What are the parents gonna do?
How do you make a plumber die?
You kill his family.
Like if your dad is abusive.
What do you call a white kid at the back of the class?
School shooter.
Why did the gay man get raped?
He assed for it.