Violence jokes
I saw this kid who looked depressed, so I threw a torch at him. I thought I would brighten up his day.
You've probably heard this one before, but screw it.
What's the difference between Jesus Christ and the kid I just killed?
Jesus Christ probably died a virgin.
How long does it take for 10 dead babies to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.
What 3 words started Jeffery Dahmer's cannibalism?
"This isn't ketchup."
A baby seal walks into a club...
How to make white ice cream red... blend a baby into it!
Teacher: What's 3 minus 1? Me: I don't know. Teacher: How about this, you have three cakes, I take one. How many cakes do you have? Me: Three. Teacher: If I take one cake from your three, what do you have? Me: Three cakes and a dead teacher.
What's the same with a controller and a woman?
They both work if you hit them.
It's not rape if they can't say no. Duct tape.
What's the quickest way to get to a girl's heart?
What?
Chidori. :)
What was the first thing that went through the 9/11 victims' heads?
Their ankles.
This one kid never stands up for the pledge of allegiance, and I'm tired of it.
Today, I push him out of his wheelchair.
What would Donald Trump be if he was Black?
Shot in the head.
My teacher: If you could go anywhere, where would you go?
Me: Demon Slayer.
My teacher: Why?
The quiet kid: TO GET EATEN BY A DEMON OR BECOME ONE!!!
Why do you put a baby into a blender feet first?
So you can see the look on its face...
What’s red and goes 100 miles per hour?
Babies in a blender.
Steps to win a Nerf war:
Step 1. Take out Nerf bullets.
Step 2. Load hollow points.
Step 3. Win!
I must have raped a woman in a skip. She said she felt rubbish.
Me: Hey, that's a really heavy bag, do you have a lot of books and magazines in there?
The Quiet Kid: Yeah, magazines.....
What do birds and children have in common?
If you shoot them, they die.