Violence jokes
What do you get when you have 10 chicken nuggets and little Jimmy tries to take one?
10 chicken nuggets and a dead little Jimmy.
What do you call a serial killer that only kills fat people?
A mass murderer.
What’s the difference between a feminist and a school shooter?
A school shooter actually makes an impact on its targets.
Why are Americans stupid? They shoot everyone that goes to school.
I recently learned that it's politically incorrect to talk about taking part in a school shooting.
Apparently the term "school photos" is more acceptable.
Memes
Sharpness V belt
So who did it? the I.S.S. teacher said.
1 hour before:
So let me get...
Random person: Wait, what? You BROKE UP WITH HER!
Me: I SWEAR, JHONNY, THIS IS THE 3RD TIME YOU BUTT INTO MY CONVERSATION! SO... HERE... YOU... GO! *punches*
How do you turn a baby into a dog?
Douse it in gasoline, light a match, *WOOF*!
About the guy who gave Stevie Wonder a cheese grater...
He thought it was the most violent book he'd ever read.
How do you make a pink Smurf?
You peel the skin off.
My doctor said, "You have 1 year to live."
I said, "You wanna bet?"
Bam, a gunshot!
Where is the cheapest gun range? Your local public school.
What do you do if you see someone raping your girlfriend? Help out. There is no way she can fight both of you. Then, find the poor man a lawyer.
What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon?
One screams when you put it in a blender, and the other one is a cooperative little fruit.
I saw this really old guy with the Hitler stache, so I decided to start beating him up.
It was very weird when a camera crew came out with Harrison Ford and started yelling at me.
What's the difference between Isaac Newton and the baby I just stabbed to death?
Isaac Newton died a virgin.
1 like = 1 more missile aimed at a hospital.
A guy stole my car last night. Before dialing 911 I thought, "Fuck it. Let him explain the dead bodies in the trunk."
Go drop-kick an orphan. No one will know, not like his parents would know.
How do you make a builder cry?
Kill his family.
What is the world's greatest invention? The ball gag, do you know why? Honestly, officer, I never heard her say no.