Violence jokes
Roses are red, violets are blue. I've got 5 fingers, she will get 2.
Who wants to see me rape a toddler?
Two hunters are in the woods and one falls to the ground.
Terrified, he dials 911 and says, “Help! I think my friend is dying. What do I do?” The nurse says, “I need you to make sure he’s dead.” The hunter replies, “Ok, I’ll be right back.” The nurse is startled after hearing a gunshot. The hunter comes back and says, “I checked. Now what do I do?” The nurse replies, “I need you to make sure his heart has completely stopped.” She is startled when she hears the sound of a taser. The hunter comes back and says, “What’s next?” The nurse replies, “I need you to make sure his brain has completely shut down.” The nurse is once again startled when she hears the sound of a bone being crushed by what seemed to be a hammer. The hunter comes back and asks, “Anything else?” The nurse says, “Nope. That’s it.”
My favorite sex position is the “JFK,” I splatter all over her as she screams to get out of the car 😂
What's the difference between a broken shovel and a young child?
The shovel doesn't cry when you swing it into a wall repeatedly.
Who's Joe?
Joe rapes.
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Kamikaze!
Kamikaze wh—
おいおい、お前を殺して、その塔ごと地面に叩き込んでやるぞ! いいな?
What do you do during a shooting? Why, join in, of course...
Why do American guns only have 30 bullets?
'Cause that's how many kids are in a class.
What's better than swinging a baby around on a rope?
Stopping it with a shovel.
When the school shooter finally leaves your classroom, but then the autistic kid next to you's sketchers light up.
Why did the clown stop smiling?
Someone chopped his lips off.
How do make an adult cry?
Stab him 10000 times until the floors are red with human blood.
Where do rape victims buy their clothes from?
The kids section.
Someone at school judged my grammar.
I judged theirs by the terms "school" and "rifle range" being mixed up the next day.
What’s the best part about fucking a dead bitch?
You don’t need consent.
What's the smartest crime?
3rd degree murder.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?
Depends how hard you can throw them.
How can you make an Otter Pop become funny?
Take your shotgun and make an otter go "pop!"
What's the first thing that a battered woman does when she gets out of the shelter?
My last if she knows what's good for her.