Violence jokes
When the school shooter gets killed and everyone is cheering, but you walk toward his gun; "I will finish what you started."
Roses are red, violets are blue, if I had a brick, I’d throw it at you.
What's the difference between an onion and a dead baby? The baby doesn't cry when you chop it.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Stranger.
Stranger who?
Stranger, why are you in my house masticating my apparent dead wife?
What has more brains than a student in a school shooting? The wall behind them.
Why do Americans always win gold at the shooting Olympics?
Because they practice at the best schools.
The kid with a gun walked into my classroom and fucking shot the teacher.
He pointed the gun at me and asked, "What's 2+2?" I answer him and he writes the answer down on his test. He did this with every kid. He got a 100%, expelled, and a lifetime in prison. Hey, at least he gets free food.
My dad's the oldest, and when he was young, he shot my grandpa's balls off, but I thought about it. How does my dad have younger brothers?
Guys, I'm back...
Here's my joke:
What is blue and red all over?
Blood in the water of a shark attack victim.
Like if your dad is abusive.
What is scarier than a pile of dead babies?
The bottom one ate its way out!
What's better than swinging a baby around on a rope?
Stopping it with a shovel.
Teacher: Hey Timmy (the quiet kid), what comes after X?
The quiet kid: Splosion.
Teacher: What comes after A?
The quiet kid: AK-47.
Teacher: Faints.
A bullet is like an arrow.
Nothing can stop it from going through your head.
What has two butts and kills people?
An assassin.
What's the difference between a broken shovel and a young child?
The shovel doesn't cry when you swing it into a wall repeatedly.
When the school shooter finally leaves your classroom, but then the autistic kid next to you's sketchers light up.
What do you call a child version of Batman?
The Raped Crusader.
How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall red?
It depends on how hard you throw them.
What's the difference between sex and rape? Some effective drugs.