Violence jokes
Q: What did the man say after removing another man's hat? A: He was decapitated.
Suicide bombers, carry bombs and remember to breathe.
What is it called when a gay guy punches someone?
Fruit punch.
What is red, white, and blue and makes me proud to live in this country?
The baby in the corner I choked, stabbed, and then came on.
What's the difference between a yandere and a gun?
Nothing.
Flip them off the wrong way and you're dead.
What do you think is going through kids' heads during school shootings? Bullets.
What's worse than a truck full of dead babies? One alive at the bottom.
When I was younger, I thought that it was cool to use knives because kids used to ask me to use them.
By the way, have you seen my sister?
Q: Why is it fun to hit an orphan?
A: Who are they going to tell, their parents?
I would kill for something to eat--the cannibal.
If you want to see my foes, bring a shovel and bring a map and a getaway car just in case we get caught.
When the school shooter is just about to leave your classroom, and you think you're in the clear, but the Down syndrome kid says, "Goodbye."
How many babies does it take to paint a room red?
Depends how hard you throw 'em.
Q. How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A. Gotta be more than 9 'cause my basement is still dark.
Three guys are escaping from North Korea through a tunnel.
The guards know that they are coming and will shoot them with paintball guns as a warning.
The guys show up and the guards shoot them.
The guys die because the guards used real guns.
Why do you put a baby into a blender feet first?
So you can see the look on its face...
Guess how I'm getting laid tonight?
"I'm stronger than you."
I wanted to solve teen suicide, so I shot up a middle school.
I remember my grandma's last words:
"What are you doing with that axe?"
What do you call a butt that kills people?
An ASSassin :)