Vehicle jokes
What's the difference between my car and a school bus? A school bus takes them back home.
When two wheelchairs hit each other, is it a fender bender?
What are kidnappers' favorite shoes? White vans.
Q: Why couldn't the bicycle stand up?
A: Because it was too tired!! 😴😴😴
How many orphans does it take to "test drive" a bus? It depends on how much space the orphanage has and how much space the cemetery has.
Were you born on a highway? Because most accidents happen on the highway.
Why did Joey drop his ice cream?
He was hit by a truck. (Don't worry, the truck was fine.)
A man died and went to heaven. Every time you cheat, you get a worse car.
The first man cheated 5 times; he got a Jeep. The second man cheated 3 times; he got a BMW. The third man never cheated; he got a Lamborghini.
The second man saw the third man sad. He said, "Why are you sad?" The third man said, "I saw my wife with a scooter."
What's the difference between a pile of babies and a Porsche?
I don't have a Porsche in my garage.
How does a train eat?
It goes, "chew chew."
Why didn’t the bike stand on its own?
It was too tired.
What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine? Unlike the porcupine, the pricks are on the inside.
What did the orphan say to the other orphan?
"Get into the Batmobile, Robin."
Your teeth are so spread out my mom can drive her car through the gap in your teeth.
My sister argued with me that you can't make a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen her face when I drove pasta!
My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic. But if I'm going to have sex, it's going to be on my own Accord.
My daughter said I could never make a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!
Who can drink 20 liters of fuel without dying? A jerrycan.
I hate this. Everybody knows it's how I roll, if you jump into my van you get a Tootsie Roll. My uncle said this...
I’ll never forget my father’s last words...
Oh fuck, it’s a bus!