Bmw jokes

A man died and went to heaven. Every time you cheat, you get a worse car.

The first man cheated 5 times; he got a Jeep. The second man cheated 3 times; he got a BMW. The third man never cheated; he got a Lamborghini.

The second man saw the third man sad. He said, "Why are you sad?" The third man said, "I saw my wife with a scooter."

What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine? Unlike the porcupine, the pricks are on the inside.

A guy tried to suffocate himself with his BMW exhaust, but his engine failed.

This is the first time German engineering fails to gas someone.

What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine?

Unlike the porcupine, the pricks are on the inside.

What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies?

I don't have a BMW in my garage.

What do you call someone that is Mexican that has a BMW?

A big Mexican woman.

New Teslas don't come with a new car smell; they come with an Elon Musk.

BLM Bisexual Lust Matters.

A man crashed his new expensive car into a tree. He now knew how the Mercedes bends.

I don't need to go to the car dealership when I have a Geico scanner on my arm at all times. 😏