Your mum is so fat, when I was driving I had to swerve to avoid [her]. By the time I had finished, I had ran out of gas.
Kill yourself in anyway. I'm doing it the HIGHway.
What’s yellow and can’t swim?
A school bus full of children.
What's the last thing to go through a fly's head as it hits a car's windshield at 100 mph?
Its ass.
Luckily, his funeral was a closed casket, sorry, his car blew a gasket.
When they say you live by the sword, you die by the sword, not in Paul Walker's case. He lived by the car, died by a tree. Well, I guess the car was stumped.
If Hitler was in a car doing his salute, he would be saying, "Take the third right."
You're so skinny that when you're driving, you have to put the seat forward to reach the pedals. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Why do sisters have to be in a relationship? Because you don’t have to worry about your car.
A cement mixer has collided with a prison van. Motorists are asked to look out for 16 hardened criminals.
Why does an orphan never learn how to drive? Because he has no dad to help him.
My mom bought me a car, and she called me an ungrateful b*tch because I sat in my wheelchair the whole time.
What type of car did Hitler drive? A gas-guzzler.
Roads be so rough in Oklahoma, I saw a high lifted truck get ended riding lower than a Hot Wheels car.
"I’m going through a lot of things right now," I said frustratedly to the person on the line as I crashed straight through the next building in my car.
Your hairline reminds me of a car taking a U-turn.
Yo mama so fat when she stepped on a monster truck she turned it into a lowrider.
Why do the brakes keep squealing?
Because the driver hit it too hard.
I got caught doing donuts in the parking lot, and I know what y'all are thinking.
Who names their dog Donuts?
Therapist: So what brought you here today?
Wife: He's too literal.
Therapist: And you, sir?
Husband: My truck.
