Vegetable jokes
What does a nosy pepper do? Gets JALAPEÑO BUSINESS!
What's an edible part of a wheelchair?
A vegetable!
When I am getting bored, I hold a banana and start shaking it suddenly. It gives out juice after a few minutes. I get excited. Ohhhhhh!
Try with a cucumber.
What do you call a broccoli 🥦 when it’s a ghost?
Cauliflower!
What does a nosey pepper do?
It gets jalapeño business!
I don’t call it special ED, I call it mixed vegetables.
So, is a homosexual in a coma a fruit or a vegetable?
What is an orange cucumber?
A carrot, duh!
What's the chunkiest part of vegetable soup?
The wheelchair.
What do you call a person with Down syndrome in a bathtub?
Vegetable soup.
A blind man went to a restaurant.
"Menu sir?" asked the owner. "I'm blind, just bring me one of your dirty forks, I will smell it and order." The confused owner went to the kitchen to retrieve a fork and returned to the blind man.
The blind man smelled the fork with a deep breath, "Yes I will have the lamb with seasoned potatoes and spring vegetables." Unbelievable, thought the owner. The blind man ate and left. Two weeks later the blind man returned. The owner, wanting to know how good his smell is, quickly went to the kitchen where his wife Brenda was cooking and said, "Do me a favor and rub this fork over your private part" which she did. He then goes to the blind man and gives him the fork. The blind man takes it and puts it to his nose and says, "Oh interesting! I never knew Brenda works here!"
what do you call a bunch of retarded kids in a hot tub?
steamed vegetables.
What's the worst part about burning your vegetables before dinner?
Explaining what happened to the nursing home while you're hungry.
I was making vegetable soup yesterday, but the wheelchair wouldn’t fit.
I was driving through a neighborhood when I saw a sign that said "Autistic Child Zone." Then I thought to myself, "Oh shit, that wasn't a dog!"
What does Cangaball do after eating its vegetables?
Go on eBay to see how much he can sell the wheelchair for.
Lettuce: Tomato, you're doing great!
Tomato: Thanks for the condiment!
Q) What’s the difference between a baby and a sweet potato?
A) About 400 calories.
What do a gay guy in a wheelchair and a tomato have in common?
They’re both a fruit AND a vegetable!
If 2 vegetables have an argument, it's called beef.