Value jokes

I hope you're an organ donor so your organs can go to someone who deserves them.

Roses are red, violets are black, I traded my son for 10 Big Macs.

She's a 10, but she doesn't like sex.

Your mum is so overdue on eBay for £2 so she could get a male stripper.

I'm lonely, but all I have is my cheeseburger, but what is the matter of living if you only have one thing?

But a cheeseburger is all you need 'cause it has 1,000,000,000,000 bucks man, so I can't just take it and spend it wherever I want.

Emo girls be like, "How much am I worth? I don't know. Scan the code on your wrist."

Well, at least my adoption fee cost more than you.

If you are a student at law school, a law professor can charge you up to $98,998.00 for one semester.

If the law professor is very late and is not punctual to teach you anything about law in his class, should a law student be able to charge the law professor a certain amount of money for not being able to teach his class because he is off task and not being punctual? Is your time precious too?

If the law professor is Polish, now you know the reason why you should never go to a law school that has a "dumb polack" for a law professor.

Sorry for your luck; it sucks to be you!

Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.

What's the difference between a boy and gold?

More people want gold.

You know, people always say your life is worth it, but with me, it's worth-it-less.

I'm worth something, I got a barcode on my arm!

What’s the difference between chocolate and people?

You can’t buy people nowadays.

Some people are such treasures that you sometimes just wanna bury them.

Why did a woman believe she was a target? She had a price tag without any value to it.

What is the difference between my Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies?

I don't keep my Lamborghini in my garage.

What did the dime say to the penny? At least I have more cents than you.

The Good Old Days.

You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.

I know I'm valuable, I come with a barcode ;)

My friend, while we are shopping and I'm telling her about my mental illness: "You're priceless."

When we get to the checkout: "I'm actually $2.50."