Use Jokes

Roses are not always red, Violets are violet, not blue. Irises are never red, Petunias can be kinda blue. What does this tell us 'cept you can't trust a poet to tell the truth.

Cosmetic surgery used to be such a taboo subject. Now you can talk about Botox and nobody raises an eyebrow.

There was a girl I used to date, only to find out that she used to be a man. You could say, she put me in a trans

technically, a human is hollow. we have an empty tube through us from the mouth and nose to the asshole and dick or pussy. we are bascially tubes

My girlfriend told me she used to be a Christian I ask her why she isn't anymore and she said she liked the name Christina better

I've been trying to use Google Maps in Ukraine, but I couldn't because I only saw Russia.

I have a pen I have an Apple um Apple pen The taliban had a plane the US had a building boom 9/11

"I used to be addicted to soap, but I'm clean now."

I went to my sister room one day. I see a trophy, so I ask my sister how did you won this trophy my sister said to me the neighbors gave it to me because I gave out the best hand jobs in the neighbor. I guess my sister put her hands in good use.

my girlfriend dumped me today apparently I don't stand up for her in fights I don't care she use to push me around all the time

I was studying in Turin and my professor told me I had to use PENS only. I looked in my bag for pens and they were GONE. I looked at the surveillance footage and saw that CRISTIANO PENALDO stole ALL MY PENS. I was fuming. Shame on you Penaldo!

Chuck Norris used to be an orphan

Because some families were too scared of his bravery to adopt him

Why couldn’t people use the George Floyd action figure? Because it was vacuum sealed

yo hairline was used as the blue blint for the great wall of china

A foreign man came to America not knowing a word of English and right away began looking for a job. He became a chorus teacher and learned to say, ̈Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi! ̈ After that he joined the Army and learned to say, ̈Yes sir! ̈ After that he worked at a restaurant and learned to say, ̈Forks and knives, forks and knives! ̈ After that he worked at a candy store and picked up the words, ̈Goody-goody gumdrops! ̈ A few weeks later, there was a murder in the area and he was the first person to be interrogated by the police. The interrogation went as follows: Policeman: Who killed the man? Foreign man: Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi! Policeman: Did you kill the man? Foreign man: Yes sir! Policeman: What did you use to kill him: Foreign man: Forks and knives, forks and knives! Policeman: You ́re under arrest. Foreign man: Goody-goody gumdrops!