Use jokes
I saw a person raping a woman in an alleyway. I decided to help...she doesn't stand a chance between us.
Yo mama is so poor, she buys used food.
Why can't orphans use a phone?
Because they don't have a home screen.
Grandma: You guy's generation is on too much technology.
Kid: Well, you're the ones that raised us.
Other family members: ...
What does a disabled disco play?
"When your legs don’t work like they used to before."
Memes
Your hairline's so far back even Bill Nye the Science Guy couldn't use photosynthesis to fix it.
I posted up on my story that I got a new cut. My friends and family called the cops...
I used to be emo.
Q: What do you use on your tuba when it breaks?
A: Tuba-glue.
We split because she would always say I never listen, or something like that.
Bro, the US keeps bullying the UK because the queen died, and do you know the meme "No Bitches?" Yeah, they put "No Queen" instead. And guess what? The UK replied this time and said, "No Towers?" I was shocked. UK's most devious lick.
A telescope has two uses:
1. To look in space. 2. To see your hairline.
What do whales use to rub out a mistake in their homework? Their blubber.
Why was the piano waiting at the front door?
Because it forgot which key to use!
Why are women like KFC? After you finish with the thigh and the breasts, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.
Why was the chicken in trouble?
For using fowl language!
Why do orphans use iPhone X's?
Because they can't find home.
What type of flour do orphans use to bake with...? Self-raising flour!
Don't leave us hanging, Sayori.
Yesterday I made food using oil--olive oil.
(I love oil!)
Your forehead is so big I could use it to get free TV.