My girlfriend told me she used to be a Christian I ask her why she isn't anymore and she said she liked the name Christina better
All of you idiots who think that it is ok to laugh about us foster kids needs to be shot
The little camel asks his mother: Mum why do we have these big humps? Because in these hump there is some water and in the hot desert we can drink. And mum. Why do we have this large fur? Because the dessert at night is so cold and then we don’t feel cold. And mum. Why do we got these big hoofs. Because the desert the sand is hot and the hoofs save us from the hot sand. But mum. What the fuck are we doing here in the national zoo?
Yesterday I got detention because I said to the emo kit come hang with us
Roses are Red, Violets are blue, U make me pee like I drink tea, you make me go buzz, like becoming a fuzz, It sticks in, but it goes to the bin, after its use, it will be reused, no it is not what your thinking its -~-(clay)-~-
Elmo- welcome to the new micronation of Tickelandia
dude- why are we close to Disneyland.
kid- I don't know. Elmo- rule 1 you must not tell the afforests or Bob Iger about us.
meanwhile Officer- come on Elmo you're going to prison. *Officer arrests Elmo* Elmo- But who wants Tickels.
why cant orphan use a phone? because they dont have a home screan
Your mama is such a hoe! It took her 4 attempts to pass her driving test. She couldn't get used to the front seat.
What does people use more than you that is yours?
When is the only time Kamala Harris is using her head? When she is giving it.
We split because she used always say I never listen, or something like that
Q. What do you use on your tuba when it breaks
A. A tuba-glue
one day a teacher says:"what does a pig give us?" a student says:"bacon!" the teacher says:"good! now, what does a chicken give us?" a student says:"eggs!" the teacher says:"good! now, what does a fat cow give us?" a student says:"homework!" the whole class laughs
How did the pornstar cut herself while using a drill? She was to used to grabbing the tip.
Your hairline is so bad that they used it as trenches at the World War.
troll your friend by saying i and saying cup and then tell them that that means i see you pee LOL there is also lettuce cup witch means let us see you pee
I just come across a pile of cash in the parking lot.
Usually I just use tissues
Sara opens her lunch and reads the letter inside. "I packed your favorite -love mom," Sara reaches in and announces "yay PB and J!" Tom goes in his lunch and pulls out a letter "go buy yourself something healthy at the cafeteria -Dad," then pulls out 20 bucks and says "nice!" They both look at Craig as he pulls out a letter. Craig reads the letter in his head, it said "WE HAVE YOUR PARENTS, THEY TELL US THEY KEEP THE MONEY UNDER THEIR BED. BRING $10 000 TO THE RANDAVOU POINT OR THEY WILL BE KILLED. YOU DIDN'T TAKE US SERIOUSLY LAST TIME SO THERE IS MORE PROOF IN YOUR LUNCH." Craig throws down the letter and pulls a finger out of his lunch. Tom and Sara look shocked, then Craig says "ugh, severed finger, again!"
I would make a joke about silver the hedgehog... but it's no use!
Why couldn’t people use the George Floyd action figure? Because it was vacuum sealed.
