Branch jokes
Which branch of the military accepts toddlers? The infantry.
Trees are so social. They're always branching out.
Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?
Because he died.
Can I branch out to some tree puns? Willow you allow me it’s only fur. No? Oakome on!
Are you a tree? Cuz I’m trying to hang with you. ;)
what came first, The apple or the girl? The apple, because the tree left her hanging :)
What hits the ground first, the feather or the emo?
The feather, because the emo is hung in the tree.
What is your arm's favorite military branch? The army.
Q: What season can an orphan see their family tree?
A: Fall.
If you don't get it, in the fall trees have no leaves, there [are] just empty branches, like an orphan's tree.
How does a tree access the internet?
By logging in and branching out!
What's the similarity between an emotional and a leaf?
The emo is still hanging.
Did the tree high five the emos?
No, he just left them hanging.
"Grandma, tell me a story!" I said as we huddled near the campfire.
"Alright," she said, "Once, there was a tree named Timmy, he was my best tree friend. I used to read books under him and climb all his branches."
"Where is Timmy now?" I asked.
Grandma pointed to the campfire.
What did the tree say when it gets horny? My wood has a splinter.
I like plants, but then I decided to turn over a new leaf and branch out.
A man entered the bank branch and asked the teller to withdraw his account balance. The teller debited his account and gave the man all his money. Then the man counted the money and asked the teller to deposit it back into his account.
The teller asked the man why he withdrew the money and deposited it back. Then the man replied, "I wanted to make sure all my money is safe and tallies with my records."
Lol
Are you interested in it?
More than two boot branches.
What did the tree do when the bank closed?
It started its own branch.
A bird was on a branch at school today. I turn away to talk to my friends, and another bird was there when I turned around. I turn around again, and the birds are having fucking sex!!!
What the fuck.
Now I've seen everything.
Why did the koala climb the tree?
To get to the other branch. :)
He made it, don't worry!