Tree jokes

What is the difference between a car and a tree?

A tree cannot drive, but a car can drive.

What’s white and crunchy and swings through trees?

A meringue-atang.

What did a tree do for a human rights day at a tree?

I had no time today after a night with you today, but you walk away.

Tongue twister: Through three cheese trees Three free fleas flew. While these three fleas flew, freezy breeze blew. Freezy breeze made these three trees freeze; freezy trees made these tree's cheese freeze.

That's what made these three fleas sneeze. 👍😀

We saved a transvestite in a tight mini skirt from a tree.

I thought I showed a lot of balls.

Y'all are whack at jokes, y'all suck!

What is the difference between a human and a tree? A human can walk, and a tree 🌳 cannot walk.

I wanna be a Christmas decoration cause they always do be hanging.

What is stronger than family?

The tree Paul Walker hit.

What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?

Well, at least one gets picked.

What do you call an orphan's family tree? A stump.

If you drop an emo and a piece of paper from a tree, which will hit the ground first?

The piece of paper because the rope will stop the emo.

An emo texted a tree, "Wanna hang out?"

The tree ghosted her.

What are the similarities between an emo and some Christmas lights?

They are both going to be hanging from a tree.

Halloween! The day nobody questions the bodies dangling in your tree!

Teacher: Describe a penguin.

Student: Black, white, beak.

Teacher: Good, now describe an orphan.

Student: Sad, maybe depressed, no family.

Teacher: Amazing, now describe a cow.

Student: Brown bun hair, red shirt, white skirt, pantyhose, and dollar tree shoes.

Teacher: No! How does that describe a cow?

Student: It describes you tho.

An emo girl walks up to a tree to give it a high five... the tree left her hanging.

How do emos propose?

"Would you like to join my family tree?"

Why do trees never call emo kids?

The emos always hang up on them.

A depressed boy went to high five a tree, guess what the tree did?

The tree left him hanging.