Transportation jokes
You can sink the Titanic like you can drive a bike. Not a joke.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels.
How do you fit 27 New Zealand tourists in a 15-seater bus?
Simple. All in the ashtray.
Your hairline goes so far back that cars on a highway don't know which way to turn.
Say what you want about Hitler, at least he got the trains to run on time.
What did the traffic light say to the truck?
"Don't look, I'm about to change!"
What’s the difference between a motorcycle and a mutilated body?
I don’t have a motorcycle in my garage.
The first trains were often derailed. They had a bad track record.
What do we want? Plane noises!
When do we need it? Neeooooooowwwww!
A truck carrying Vicks VapoRub overturned on the highway. Amazingly, there was no congestion for eight hours straight.
What is long, yellow and can't swim?
A bus full of children.
Tonight, on Top Gear!
James May dives a bus full of kids off a mountain!
Richard Hammond starts WW3 in Germany!
And I fly a plane into the World Trade Center!
What's the difference between me and a bus?
I'm not on fire...
Q: Why did Sally drop her ice cream?
A: She got hit by a bus.
What is the difference between runners and my car?
My car is still running.
Why aren’t Make-A-Wish kids allowed to fly?
Because they rarely make it out of the terminal.
Q. How does an ISIS terrorist practice safe sex?
A. He marks the camels that kick.
What do you call a nun on a bike?
Virgin Mobile.
If you give a man a plane ticket, he will fly for a couple of hours, but if you push a man out of a plane, he will fly for the rest of his life :)
How many times does 50 fit into 9?
Get in a van and find out!