Transportation jokes
What did the traffic light say to the truck?
"Don't look, I'm about to change!"
You can sink the Titanic like you can drive a bike. Not a joke.
Say what you want about Hitler, at least he got the trains to run on time.
Your hairline goes so far back that cars on a highway don't know which way to turn.
A truck carrying Vicks VapoRub overturned on the highway. Amazingly, there was no congestion for eight hours straight.
What do we want? Plane noises!
When do we need it? Neeooooooowwwww!
The first trains were often derailed. They had a bad track record.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels.
How do you fit 27 New Zealand tourists in a 15-seater bus?
Simple. All in the ashtray.
What’s the difference between a motorcycle and a mutilated body?
I don’t have a motorcycle in my garage.
What is long, yellow and can't swim?
A bus full of children.
Tonight, on Top Gear!
James May dives a bus full of kids off a mountain!
Richard Hammond starts WW3 in Germany!
And I fly a plane into the World Trade Center!
What's the difference between me and a bus?
I'm not on fire...
Q: Why did Sally drop her ice cream?
A: She got hit by a bus.
Were you born on the highway? 'Cause that's where most accidents happen.
Why did the chickens cross the road?
To get to KFC.
What's yellow but can't swim?
A bus full of children.
Why don't dwarfs have cars?
Because they can't get in the door.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandpa, not screaming in terror like all the passengers on the plane he was flying.
Here comes the plane... the twins. ☠️