Transportation jokes
What has four wheels and flies?
A garbage truck.
A penis is driving a car when all of a sudden it gets hit by a car, what did the penis end up saying?
Aaaawwwww I got dicklash!
Why don't rappers use the subway?
Because they don't want to miss their next rhyme.
How do fish get to school?
By the octobus.
I was riding my bike down the road!
When a car started coming, I started running.
It put me in a crash with my elbow through my ass! ;)
Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road? It got stuck in a crack.
What time is it when you get home, can walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home from school and walk walk home from school and walk walk home?
🏡 night time and I can drive to the car tomorrow night.
Someone went to fly and thought of pizza.
What's yellow and can't swim?
A bus full of kids.
If you're serious, congratulations on getting this far in life with absolutely no comprehension of reality.
If you had this kind of knowledge about driving a car, you'd be sitting 30 feet away from it, throwing pieces of pickles at a barn and shouting ‘shazam’ into an empty iPhone case, wondering why the car wasn't moving.
I didn't mean to call an Afghanistan hotline. I told them I was depressed, then they asked if I know how to drive a truck. I don't know how that has anything to do with it!
What did a car say hi to?
It said hi to the school.
Why did the boy drop his ice cream?
He got hit by a bus.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
What is big, yellow, and can't swim?
A school bus full of children.
A man got pulled over, and the policeman had stepped out and said, "Do you know how fast you were going?"
The man said, "I was trying to catch up with the traffic."
The officer said, "There is no traffic."
The man said, "Exactly, that’s how far behind I am!"
What do you call a nun on a bike?
Virgin Mobile.
I gave up my seat to blind lady because she couldn't find any--let's just say I lost my job as a bus driver.
Plane versus plane. Who wins? Plane.
I like my woman like I like my coffee: in a big sack on top of a donkey.