Transportation jokes
Kaj je pomaranča rekla, ko jo je povozil avto?
So last night I went on a taxi and I showed them your photo. All they said was I could ride him, it would be expensive though, since from his eyebrows to hairline is at least £100.
What's the difference between the 44 out of the 45 people who died in the Yaroslavl crash and the nine people who died in the helicopter crash?
Only one was ever famous. Vasicek and Kobe Bryant were the champions.
What's black and yellow and can't swim?
A bus full of orphans.
A penis is driving a car when all of a sudden it gets hit by a car, what did the penis end up saying?
Aaaawwwww I got dicklash!
When they were going around giving out brains and you thought they were saying "train," so you said, "No thanks, I’ll take the next one!" 🤣
Why did the car drive over the cake?
'Cause it was in tiers!! Lol, sorry this ain't funny.
I love riding my bike 🚲.
What did Columbus use to cross the ocean?
He used a bus.
What is the difference between a tree and walk walk home and walk walk home from school?
My sister said, "LET'S GO TO PIZZA!" So, I went to the pizza shop with her and she replied, "We really only needed the car?"
I was on a plane and my mom said, "It's just a little turbulence."
And I said, "Mom, we just got on the runway!"
- Why is that flight waiting at 30,000 feet height?
- One tire became flat. They are changing it in the middle of the journey.
I gave her a lift back to her crib because her car wouldn’t start.
Why couldn't the bicycle stand? It was two tired...
Caesar salad, Jack and Jill, little Johnny Koala,
Zebra, monkey, vegetables, bus, baa, bus.
Timmy has 5 apples.
His train is 7 minutes early.
Calculate the mass of the sun.
20 fridges are loaded onto a plane, only 19 come off.
Okay, moving on, you took too long. How many steps does it take to put an elephant into a fridge? (*Their reply:* Idk how many)
3: Open the fridge, put the elephant into the fridge, and close the door.
How do you put a giraffe into the fridge? (*Their reply:* 3...)
Wrong, 4: Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the giraffe, and close the door.
Why did Sully fall off the swing? A fridge fell on her.
A bus full of ugly people is driving down the street. The bus crashes and everyone goes to heaven. They see Saint Peter, and he feels bad for them and grants them one wish before they go into heaven. The first one says, "I wish to be attractive." The second one says the same.
Meanwhile, the 3rd person in line is giggling and snickering and laughing while Saint Peter is granting wishes. Curiously, he asks why he is laughing. He says, "I was going to wish that they turned ugly again."
They said I couldn't drive.
Now they know I can't cause they are all dead.