Transportation jokes
What’s the difference between a Mercedes and a Skoda?
Princess Di wouldn’t be seen dead in the back of a Skoda...
Yo mama so fat, when she went on the elevator, it went down.
A "monster" that has 2 heads, 2 bodies, 6 feet, why am I not afraid of the "monster"? It's my dad riding a horse.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had diarrhea.
When does the slowest person go as fast as a train?
When he is on the train.
Why did the bus cross the road?
I taught my dog how to play the trumpet on the London Underground over the weekend.
He went from Barking to Tooting in just under 20 minutes.
The police officer in London, who used fake Covid rules to arrest a young woman, drive her more than 50 miles out of London in a hire car, murder her, and do whatever to her, has appealed against his Whole Life tariff.
He should be relieved it was only that! Could've been worse... could've married her!
You're so bald, United Airlines has asked for permission to land.
My sister bet me $100 that it was impossible for me to build a working car out of spaghetti.
You should have seen her face as I drove pasta!
I saw a bus the other day with some boy scouts at the back. One of them was having fun getting his knot-tying badge.
What do you call a wheelchair on fire?
Hot Wheels.
Yo mama is so fat she can't even get in her own car because she's fat.
Yo momma so fat, when she gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down!
What’s yellow and can sink a bus full of kids?
What do you call a wheelchair on fire?
Hot wheels.
If you run next to a car, you get tired, but if you run behind it, you get exhausted.
I'll be here all week... sadly enough for you.
Which train is loaded with bubble gum?
A chew-chew train.
I'd rate the pilot a 9/11.
Your forehead is so big that it's a 20 dollar taxi ride from your eyebrow to your hairline.