Transportation jokes
Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because they can't.
I was riding my bike when I saw a man's head in the wheel. It was mine.
What's the worst time to fly a plane?
Your teeth are so yellow they slow down traffic.
What has 30 legs but can't swim?
A bus full of children!
What do you call an autistic kid going down the stairs in a wheelchair?
Hot Wheels!
I didn’t know how to fasten my seatbelt. Then it clicked.
You are so fat that when you wear a yellow raincoat, a running person behind you shouted, "Taxi!"
Why did the frog take the bus to work today?
His car got toad away.
Why are planes the fastest readers? Because they went through 100 stories in 20 seconds.
Your teeth are so spread out my mom can drive her car through the gap in your teeth.
What’s the difference between a Mercedes and a Skoda?
Princess Di wouldn’t be seen dead in the back of a Skoda...
Yo mama so fat, when she went on the elevator, it went down.
A "monster" that has 2 heads, 2 bodies, 6 feet, why am I not afraid of the "monster"? It's my dad riding a horse.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had diarrhea.
When does the slowest person go as fast as a train?
When he is on the train.
Why did the bus cross the road?
I taught my dog how to play the trumpet on the London Underground over the weekend.
He went from Barking to Tooting in just under 20 minutes.
The police officer in London, who used fake Covid rules to arrest a young woman, drive her more than 50 miles out of London in a hire car, murder her, and do whatever to her, has appealed against his Whole Life tariff.
He should be relieved it was only that! Could've been worse... could've married her!
You're so bald, United Airlines has asked for permission to land.