What did Amtrak say at the Olympics?
I AM keeping Trak!
My ex-girlfriend got hit by a bus. I also lost my bus driver's license.
My dad said he'd get the milk, but he forgot I was in his car.
What happens if a boy bumps into a dog?
It’s a bumper team.
Plane crash in China... pilots names released in the incident are as follows:
Sum Ting Wong.
Wei Toh Low.
Ho Lee Fuk.
Ban Din Ouch.
What do you call an Indian plane that comes back?
A Boomerang.
I saw my midget neighbor at a bus stop.
"Jump in, I'll give you a lift home," I said.
"Bugger off!" he shouted back.
"What an ungrateful little man," I thought as I zipped up my backpack and continued my walk.
How do you ride two bikes at once?
You ride them in tandem!
When I finished high school, I wanted to take my graduation money and buy myself a motorcycle, but my mom said no.
See, she had a brother who died in a horrible motorcycle accident when he was eighteen, and I could just have his motorcycle.
Yo... Kobe, you're going down man. Did you forget the low grade fuel?
What can you say about planes that you can say about stocks?
They both be flying??
Floor on the road?
They call me an elevator because I let people down.
Random Kid: Aye man where was Kobe flying to?
Launch Site: Umm, he might have gone too close to here, sorry if he might have crashed...
What do we want? Racecar noises!
When do we want them? NEOWWWWW!
Why do orphans ride the bus? Because they have no parents to drop them off.
I was on a flight to California, but my next in the Empire State Building.
I didn't mean to call an Afghanistan hotline. I told them I was depressed, then they asked if I know how to drive a truck. I don't know how that has anything to do with it!
What is the road on a hill?
Hillside.
I got a GTR yesterday, now my kids say, "GTR we there yet?"
