Transportation jokes
What do women and airplanes have in common?
A cockpit.
Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.
1950: In the future there will be flying cars.
2018: Pewdiepie shuts down Shane Dawson.
I like my woman like I like my coffee: in a big sack on top of a donkey.
Why couldn’t Billy go to school today?
The bus driver hit Sally.
If you turn the word "racecar" backwards, it says "racecar".
But if you turn the racecar sideways, you have Paul Walker's blood on your hands.
What's the difference between my car and a hooker? I park my car in a garage instead of leaving it on the side of the road.
What's the difference between a school bus and my Dad's van?
School buses usually don't have screaming and crying children.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because she was hit by a bus.
There was an air crash of a Boeing 737-800 which can carry around 300 passengers.
It crashed in a cemetery.
They recovered 500 bodies.
Why did the egg cross the road?
'Cause he wanted to be scrambled!
Three drunk men get in a taxi. The driver knew they were drunk, so he started the car and turned it off. The first man gave him the money. The second man thanked him, but the third man slapped the driver. The driver, surprised that he noticed, asked why, and the third man replied with, "Why did you drive so fast?"
I went to a truck on wheels, they said, "Wheel feed you."
The first trains were often derailed. They had a bad track record.
What did the bus say to the other bus?
"Beep!"
What do you get when you cross a highway on a bike?
Run over.
I saw your mother get into a white Ford Taurus on the corner of Milton and Halliburton, and you're still trying to tell me she ain't got no job cause she "can't get a ride to work?"
Did you hear about the man who ran in front of the bus? He got tired.
What is Beethoven's favorite vehicle?
A van.
Can you drive a pizza? Of course, as long as you change the olive oil.