Tradition jokes
What does a priest and Christmas tree have in common? The balls are just for decoration.
What's the traditional food of Black Jews? - Kosher watermelon...
The show COPS has been dropped from broadcast,
honoring the longstanding tradition of police turning off their cameras.
Why did the woman cross the road?
What’s she doing out of the kitchen in the first place?
Why was baptism invented?
How else was a priest supposed to clean his sex toys?
In a deep village in Germany, an old man asked his granddaughter, "What are you doing?"
His granddaughter replies, "Removing Polish with chemicals."
Grandpa said, "When I was young, I did the same."
Today is Good Friday, so there will be no meat for us to eat. Instead, we have to do what lesbians do and eat fish.
A man was raping a woman and thought the year was 1970, and he exclaimed to the judge later that he was her husband.
She got sent to the Asylum for Hysteria.
Wait, what? Was he actually her husband?
He was a Christian, so that actually meant he was AFTER the rape.
Wait, what? The Bible doesn't say that.
Actually yes, it does, and marital rape was legal until 1990.
WAIT WHAT? That's not funny.
I'll tell ya what's funny, that you think the women have nothing to complain about.
I like Christmas.
It’s the holiday where an old man breaks into people’s homes so he can give them toys! :) yaaaaay 😁
Why can't an orphan get married? It doesn't have its parents' blessing.
Why do priests dunk babies in water at their baptism? Because it's important to wash your sex toys.
A 10 year old girl lays in her bed and excitedly waits for Santa to come. When Santa eventually comes she giggles, shivers, and orgasms.
Finally, as a special thank you, she sucks off Santa’s wet cock.
Santa's sack is big because he only comes once a year, but his sack is SO BIG after containing the lovely eggnog he has that those weigh the sleigh.
He never had kids because he comes in the chimney.
Me: How do you celebrate Christmas?
Orphan: I don't know what you mean.
Me: There is no one to give a present.
Before you leave that marriage, remember that one innocent 🐐 goat was killed for your traditional marriage. 😔
Why are Santa's balls so big?
Because he comes once a year.
How do Ephippians celebrate their kids' first birthday?
Put a flower on their gravestone.
My dad told me Santa was black, so instead of cookies and milk waiting for him when he came down the chimney, he got cornbread and purple Kool-Aid.
Why don't Chinese people believe in Santa? Cause they make the toys.
Why do orphans hate Christmas?
Father Christmas isn’t a thing.