Touch jokes
Roses are red,
foxes are red,
I like your butt, let me touch it forever.
There are 3 men: an American, a French, and an Italian who have to take a trip and take the plane.
The American puts his hand out the window and says: "We are in America, I touched the Statue of Liberty." The French says: "We are in France, I touched the Eiffel Tower." The Italian says: "We are in Italy, I touched the garbage!"
I swear your eyebrows have attachment issues, they're touching right now.
Unbelievable! When doctors touch my body, it’s alright, but if I do the same to some lady, apparently it’s "harassment!"
White 40 year olds love little white kids, and so does Trump! The biggest hands to touch the kids and his daughter!
"Simon says touch your chin."
The fat people be like, "Which one?"
Your hairline can fit a truck without touching either side.
What was Michael Jackson's favorite song?
"Touch Me (I Want Your Body)."
How do baseballs communicate?
They touch base!
My chocky milk, don't you touch my chocky milk! It's mine! No it's not! It's your face! Ccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccchhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooccccccccccccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
My dad said not to touch this thingy called a gun, but I looked down that pole and pressed that thing, and now I'm in heaven.
My gf told me I have to be more in touch with my feminine side, so I crashed the car.
"Hee hee touch my pp."
The department of touch yourself is coming to the UK near you. I hope Scotland gets freedom. I can't wait to leave England and live in Scotland.
Once i was walking along the beach and there was a girl with no arms or legs there, i walked by and she said excuse me, will you touch me ive never been touched before, i was like okay so i touched her, i kept on walking along and there was the same girl, she said sir will you kiss me, i went alright so i went up and kissed her, i thought that was weird but anyway i kept walking along and there she was again, she said sir will you fuck me? I went okay so i picked her up and threw her in the ocean and went YOUR FUCKED NOW
Why can't I touch little old women, but nursing home nurses can?
What touches kids and is made out of plastic?
Michael Jackson, hee hee!
Donald Trump didn't build a wall because he likes going to islands to touch little girls.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Old man Jeffrey touches the youth.
What's big, black, and touches children?
Harambe.