Worst Jokes Ever
Why didn't the Japanese guy get a high five? Logan Paul left him hanging.
What does a serial killer make for breakfast?
Scrambled legs and toes.
What do you tell a female with 2 black eyes?
Nothing, you already told her twice.
The sun isn’t the only thing that rose up this morning...
What's similar between a fetus and a failed mission?
You abort it.
Did you know my grandpa was in WW2? He killed Hitler.
Why did everyone suggest that the cheetah eat all the pumpkins?
Because he cheated at everything!
What is black and white, black and white, black and white and green?
Three zebras fighting over a pickle.
What do you call an alligator that reads maps? Navigator.
What is blonde, has six legs, and roams Michael Jackson’s dreams every night?
Hanson.
When I was in middle school, I was kidnapped by a terrorist organization.
Al-gebra.
Man: I must confess, Father.
Priest: What are you here to confess?
Man: I hit my wife and blamed her for what happened to our son.
Priest: And what happened to your son?
Man: He said a man raped him.
Priest: When and where did this happen?
Man: A local church. I don't know which one.
Priest: ...By whom?
Man: A priest, he said. He said the priest had black hair and blue eyes, kind of like you.
Priest: ...Shit
A husband and wife at custody court. The judge looks sternly at the ex-wife.
Judge: "Why do you think you deserve custody of the child?"
Ex-wife: "I brought him into this world, so I should have custody of him."
Judge: "That is a simple yet good reason."
Then the judge looks toward the ex-husband.
Judge: "Why do you think you deserve custody of the child, sir?"
The ex-husband thought long and hard about his response. After a brief moment of silence, he replies, "If I put money into a Pepsi machine and a Pepsi comes out, is it mine or the machine's?"
If God didn’t mean for us to have sex with 11-year-old girls, why did he make them so sexy and so much physically weaker?
A midget had a disease, and the cure was on the highest shelf.
What does my dad have in common with Nemo?
They both can’t be found.
When the quiet kid lost a game of basketball and reaches into his bag,
other people in the gym: "Oh shit this nigga bout to shoot."
What makes a cult and a racist family of 5 common?
Not all are friends.
Ukraine (🇺🇦) vs Russia (🇷🇺), place your bets!
How do you get your appeal for rape charges accepted? Say you were expressing your desire for a woman, which is protected under the Constitution in freedom of expression.