Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the telemarketer cross the road?
I don't know.
I don't know either, but I hope there was a car coming.
What’s the difference between a fruit and an orphan? One gets chosen :)
The F in "I'm orphan" stands for family.
But there is no F.
Are you a keyboard, because I wanna tap you all night long.
Is it OK to tell a Covid patient to stay positive?
What is the difference between a broom and a mop?
It’s hard to beat my girlfriend when she’s holding the mop.
Your hairline is so far back I need binoculars to see it!
Your mom is so fat, she starts with the letter O in the alphabet because O.B.C.D. (Obesity).
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, they are all crying in a dark corner.
Yo mama so fat, when she fell I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
One morning a dad was sitting and watching TV.
His daughter comes in and says, "Dad! Why is my name Rose?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head." "Cool," Rose said.
The second daughter walked in and said, "Dad! Why is my name Daisy?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Awesome," Daisy said.
The third daughter came in and said, "DuUuUDeEeEeDrrrrrrrrr!!!" "SHUT UP, CINDER BLOCK!!!"
The twins are falling down.
What do you call a dude that is always high and gets higher than everyone else in the family? The alpha pothead!
My back is straighter than I am, and I literally have scoliosis.
Why did the orphan sit alone in the corner?
They wanted some family time.
Sorry, what’s the quickest way to get to the hospital? Easy, just stand in the middle of a busy road.
What is the difference between Usain Bolt and Hitler?
Usain Bolt can finish a race.
Your hairline is so long, people call it "The Natural Disaster!"
Why does your grandma like gardening so much?
Because she loves getting dirty down on her knees.
I like Christmas.
It’s the holiday where an old man breaks into people’s homes so he can give them toys! :) yaaaaay 😁