Worst Jokes Ever
I went up to my mom and asked how humanity started. She said it started with monkeys, so I went up to my dad and asked. My dad said it all started with Adam and Eve, so I told my dad that mom said humanity started with monkeys, and dad said mom was telling her side of the story. LOL🤣
What do the Spanish people call child abuse? Pedrophile.
My neighbor has been mad at his wife for sunbathing nude. I personally am on the fence.
The more suicidal people there are, the less suicidal people there are... Woah!
what's a depressed person's favorite game?
hangman
When my grandpa was 65, he decided to run a mile a day to keep fit.
He's 70 now, and we have no idea where he is.
Robin Hood [hands over stolen fortune]: here you are, my poor friend.
Friend: Wow thanks, I'm rich!
Robin [narrows eyes]: You're what?
I saw a kid crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. God, I love working in an orphanage.
What do you call a black person with a gun? Black ops.
What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Finding only half a worm.
Joe mama so fat she went wearing high heels and came back in flip flops.
"I bet you can't tell me something that will make me both happy and sad at the same time," a husband says to his wife. She thinks about it for a moment and then responds, "Your penis is bigger than your brother's."
What kind of car does Jesus drive?
A Christler.
how do you cut of a hillbilly's dick?
kick his sister in the jaw
Dad: Hey son, wanna hear a joke?
Son: Sure thing, dad!
Dad: Your mother and I are getting a divorce. She found out that I was sleeping with the neighbor's dog!
Son: I don't get the joke, dad.
Dad: It's my life, son! My life is the joke.
How many children does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Not 27, because my basement is still dark.
Today was the worst day ever! My brother got run over, and I lost my driver's license!
I named my dog "5 miles" so I could say I ran five miles today. I ran over 5 miles.
Man walks into a bar and sees a bear serving drinks... Sits down looking astonished. The bear says, "what's the matter you never saw a bear serving drinks?" The man says, "it's not that, I just never thought the moose would sell the place."
What is the difference between a nerd and leafyishere?
One is fun to laugh at, bully, and roast, and the other is just a nerd.