Worst Jokes Ever
Joe mama so fat she went wearing high heels and came back in flip flops.
Chuck Norris used to be an orphan.
Because some families were too scared of his bravery to adopt him.
What is the difference between a nerd and leafyishere?
One is fun to laugh at, bully, and roast, and the other is just a nerd.
What's the difference between a blonde and a car door? The harder you slam the blonde, the looser it gets.
What kind of car does Jesus drive?
A Christler.
Dad: Hey son, wanna hear a joke?
Son: Sure thing, dad!
Dad: Your mother and I are getting a divorce. She found out that I was sleeping with the neighbor's dog!
Son: I don't get the joke, dad.
Dad: It's my life, son! My life is the joke.
I named my dog "5 miles" so I could say I ran five miles today. I ran over 5 miles.
Man walks into a bar and sees a bear serving drinks... Sits down looking astonished. The bear says, "what's the matter you never saw a bear serving drinks?" The man says, "it's not that, I just never thought the moose would sell the place."
How many children does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Not 27, because my basement is still dark.
What's the difference between a dirty bus station and a lobster with breast implants?
One is a crusty bus station, and the other is a busty crustacean.
Children who are unvaccinated are less likely to have autism. You know why?
-You have to be alive to have autism.
I saw a kid crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. God, I love working in an orphanage.
What do the Spanish people call child abuse? Pedrophile.
Why do pedophiles always lose a race?
Because they come in a little behind.
Q: Where do you find a quadriplegic?
A: Right where you left 'em.
There's something on your chin... no, the 3rd one.
What's a depressed person's favorite drink?
Depresso espresso.
Did you hear about the gay choirboy?
He choked on his first hymn.
One day at school, Little Johnny and his friends were asked to do a sheet of paper which said, “Put a matching word from the word bank into the slot in the sentence that makes it make sense.” But when the teacher marked Little Johnny's papers, she asked why he put the word "bank" in every slot. And he says, “Well teacher, you said to put a word from the word bank and that's one word! So I had no choice but to put down that word!”
Q: How can you tell the sun is a boy?
A: It rises every morning.