Worst Jokes Ever
I love rap!
So, Little Johnny comes home from school knowing damn well he messed up his math test. His mother and father get home and he tells them, "Mom, I failed my math test." His mother aggressively says, "Get the belt!" Johnny says, "Why?" His mother says, "I'm gonna spank you for failing!" Johnny says, "So just like daddy?" His father turns red knowing what they did last night.
What do you call a Sikh man standing on a rope? Balan Singh.
What's flat chested and emo? A cutting board.
Yo mama is so fat, her car has stretch marks.
Yo mama's so fat, when she skips a meal, the stock market drops.
A guy runs into a bar and yells, “Quick! How tall is a penguin?”
The bartender says, “Three feet tall.”
The guy says, “Oh my God! I just ran over a nun!”
My sister said that you know that "that" is really cool. Then I said, "You know you can shut up."
I came here to laugh.
Why did the skunk 🦨 sleep 💤 under a car?
Because he wanted to wake up oily.
What’s a hairdresser’s favorite roast? Flat iron roast.
Did you hear that Alicia wrecked her Lexus?
It's really a shame. She had to give her dad 3 months worth of blowjobs before he'd pay for it.
If I'm ugly, at least I'm not you.
What is the difference between Betty White and Paul Walker?
Betty didn’t reach 100 before she died.
What's black and sits at the top of the stairs?
Stephen Hawking during a house fire.
Imagine Africans during a solar eclipse...
What's blue and doesn't weigh much?
Light blue.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
The chicken next to him farted.
Why is America bad at chess? We already lost two towers.
A man lost his toe when he dropped a knife on it.
Doctor: "I have good news and bad news."
Guy: "What's the bad news?"
Doc: "They replaced your toe with a piece of candy."
Guy: "Good news?"
Doc: "You now have tic tac toe."